INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS- subjectively experienced relationships between people, objectively manifested in the nature and methods of mutual influences exerted by people on each other in the process of joint activity and communication. M.O. - this is a system of attitudes, orientations, expectations, stereotypes and other dispositions of group members regarding their colleagues, through which people perceive and evaluate each other. These dispositions are mediated by the content, goals, values ​​and organization of joint activities and act as the basis for the formation of a socio-psychological climate in the team.

The labor collective, which is a specific socio-psychological formation, is filled with a system of interpersonal relations, manifested in the form of group activity. Interpersonal relations of the labor collective, mediated by the goals and objectives facing the economic unit. Each individual person is focused on a well-defined system of values, i.e. Everyone has their own value orientation. The totality of individual value orientations constitutes the value-oriented unity of the collective. If the team has this unity, which develops in useful joint activities, then the professional interpersonal relations of the members of the team will be streamlined. In such conditions, people involved in the process of solving group problems put all their internal problems in the background: in the course of active work there is almost no room for personal experiences.

The problem of interpersonal relations in a group can be approached from different angles. You can explore the form of these relationships, their influence on the individual, on the situation in the group. And all these aspects of interpersonal relationships are important for modern practice.

Intra-group relations have a formal and informal structure. They can be determined both by the social status of a person, his position in the system of formal relations, and by the feelings that people experience for each other in the process of joint activity.

Feeling as an indicator of interpersonal relationships was considered by many psychologists (T. Shibutani, J. Moreno, A. Maslow, K. Rogers and others).

People behave according to the rules. But feelings determine the characteristics of perception, regulate behavior.

The senses- these are stable experiences that are associated with the satisfaction of needs. They direct the mutual orientations of people. Feelings are different from emotions - subjective reactions to the impact of internal and external factors. Feelings are stronger than emotions.

Feelings have certain social functions. The social functions of feelings determine the readiness of a person for a certain way of behavior in a particular situation.

Cognitive function of the senses associated with the comprehension of the significance of this event for the person himself.

Mobilization function of the senses manifests itself in the willingness of a person to act in a certain way. Feelings determine the overall energy level of human activity.

Integrative-protective And warning function provide a choice of direction of activity, orientation in situations and relationships.

Not all interpersonal relationships are accompanied by feelings. A person may not have any feelings towards another.

If feelings are in conflict with social norms, then a person is often not aware of them. The problem of some people is that they do not quite understand what kind of feelings they experience in a given situation, if the feelings do not coincide on a conscious and unconscious level.

INTRODUCTION………………………………………………………………………..3

1. PROBLEM OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS AND INTERACTION OF PEOPLE…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

1.1. The purpose and objectives of interpersonal interaction……………………5

1.2. Features of interpersonal relationships and interaction of people…………………………………………………………………………..7

2.1. Functions of communication in interpersonal relationships………………...10

2.2. The structure of communication in interpersonal relationships……………….14

2.3. Types of communication in the system of interpersonal relations……………15

CONCLUSION…………………………………………………………………..19

REFERENCES…………………………………………..21

APPENDIX…………………………………………………………………….22

INTRODUCTION

The interaction of a person with the outside world is carried out in a system of objective relations that develop between people in their social life.

Objective relations and connections inevitably and naturally arise in any real group. Reflection of these objective relationships between group members are subjective interpersonal relationships, which are studied by social psychology.

The main way to study interpersonal interaction and interaction within a group is an in-depth study of various social factors, as well as the interaction of people who are part of this group. No human community can carry out full-fledged joint activities if contact is not established between the people included in it, and proper mutual understanding is not reached between them. So, for example, in order for a teacher to teach something to students, he must enter into communication with them.

Communication is a multifaceted process of developing contacts between people, generated by the needs of joint activities.

Over the past 20-25 years, the study of the problem of communication has become one of the leading areas of research in psychological science, and especially in social psychology. Its shift to the center of psychological research is explained by the change in the methodological situation that has clearly defined itself in social psychology in the last two decades. From the subject of research, communication simultaneously turned into a method, the principle of studying first cognitive processes, and then the personality of a person as a whole.

In this course work will be considered communication in the system of interpersonal relationships and interactions between people.

The subject of this course work is to determine the place of communication in the structure of interpersonal interaction and interaction between people. The goal is to study the features of communication in the system of interpersonal interaction and communication of people. The objectives of this course work are:

1. Consider the features of interpersonal relationships, interpersonal interaction.

2. To study the specifics of communication in the system of interpersonal relations.

To structure the numerous results of research on interpersonal interaction, a systematic approach is used, the elements of which are the subject, object and process of interpersonal interaction.

1. THE PROBLEM OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS AND INTERACTION

1.1. The purpose and objectives of interpersonal interaction

The concept of “perception of a person by a person” is not enough for a complete knowledge of people. Subsequently, the concept of “human understanding” was added to it, which implies the connection to the process of human perception and other cognitive processes. The effectiveness of perception is associated with socio-psychological observation - a property of a person that allows her to capture subtle features in human behavior, but essential for his understanding.

The characteristics of the perceiver depend on gender, age, nationality, temperament, health status, attitudes, communication experience, professional and personal characteristics, etc.

Emotional states differentiate with age. A person perceives the world around him through the prism of his national way of life. Successfully determine various mental states and interpersonal relationships those people who have a higher level of social intelligence, the object of knowledge is both the physical and social appearance of a person, the perception is fixed initially by the physical appearance, which includes physiological, functional and paralinguistic characteristics. Anatomical (somatic) features include height, head, etc. Physiological characteristics include breathing, blood circulation, sweating, etc. Functional features include posture, posture and gait, linguistic (non-verbal) features of communication include facial expressions, gestures, body movements. Unambiguous emotions are easy to differentiate, but mixed and unexpressed mental states are much more difficult to recognize. Social appearance implies social appearance, speech, paralinguistic, proxemic and activity characteristics. The social design of appearance (appearance) includes a person's clothes, his shoes, singing and other accessories. Proxemic features of communication refer to the state between the communicants and their relative position. An example from fiction demonstrating the ability to determine the place of birth and profession by features is the professor of phonetics Higgins from the play Pygmalion. The extralinguistic features of speech suggest the originality of the voice, timbre, pitch, etc. In the perception of a person, social features, in comparison with the physical appearance, are the most informative. one

The process of human cognition includes mechanisms that distort ideas about what is perceived, mechanisms of interpersonal cognition, feedback from the object, and the conditions in which perception occurs. Mechanisms that distort the emerging image of the perceived limit the possibility of objective knowledge of people. The most significant of them are: the mechanism of primacy, or novelty (it boils down to the fact that the first impression of the perceived affects the subsequent formation of the image of the object being known); projection mechanism (transferring to people of the mental characteristics of the perceiver); the mechanism of stereotyping (attributing the perceived person to one of the types of people known to the subject); the mechanism of ethnocentrism (the passage of all information through a filter associated with the ethnic lifestyle of the perceiver).

For the perception of a person and his understanding, the subject unconsciously chooses various mechanisms of interpersonal cognition. The main mechanism is the interpretation (correlation) of the personal experience of cognition of people in general with the perception of this person. The mechanism of identification in interpersonal cognition is the identification of oneself with another person. The subject also uses the mechanism of causal attribution (attributing to the perceived certain motives and reasons that explain his actions and other features). The mechanism of reflection of another person in interpersonal cognition includes the subject's awareness of how he is perceived by the object. With interpersonal perception and understanding of an object, there is a fairly strict order of functioning of the mechanisms of interpersonal cognition (from simple to complex).

In the course of interpersonal cognition, the subject takes into account the information coming to him through various sensory channels, indicating a change in the state of the communication partner. Feedback from the object of perception performs an informative and corrective function for the subject in the process of perceiving the object.

The conditions of perception of a person by a person include situations, time and place of communication. Reducing the time when perceiving an object reduces the ability of the perceiver to obtain sufficient information about it. With prolonged and close contact, evaluators begin to show condescension and favoritism.

1.2. Features of interpersonal relationships and human interaction

Interpersonal relationships are an integral part of the interaction and are considered in its context. Interpersonal relationships are objectively experienced, to varying degrees, perceived relationships between people. They are based on a variety of emotional states of interacting people and their psychological characteristics. Unlike business relationships, interpersonal relationships are sometimes called expressive, emotional.

The development of interpersonal relationships is determined by gender, age, nationality and many other factors. Women have a much smaller social circle than men. In interpersonal communication, they feel the need for self-disclosure, the transfer of personal information about themselves to others. They often complain of loneliness (I. S. Kon). For women, the features that are manifested in interpersonal relationships are more significant, and for men - business qualities. In different national communities, interpersonal relationships are built taking into account the position of a person in society, gender and age status, belonging to different social strata, etc. 2

The process of development of interpersonal relations includes the dynamics, the mechanism of regulation of interpersonal relations and the conditions for their development.

Interpersonal relations develop in dynamics: they are born, consolidated, reach a certain maturity, after which they can gradually weaken. The dynamics of the development of interpersonal relations goes through several stages: acquaintance, friendly, comradely and friendly relations. Acquaintances are carried out depending on the socio-cultural norms of society. Friendly relations form readiness for the further development of interpersonal relations. At the stage of comradely relations, there is a rapprochement of views and support for each other (it is not for nothing that they say “act like a comrade”, “comrade in arms”). Friendly relations have a common substantive content - a commonality of interests, goals of activity, etc. One can single out utilitarian (instrumental-business) and emotionally expressive (emotional-confessional) friendship (I. S. Kon).

The mechanism for the development of interpersonal relationships is empathy - the response of one person to the experiences of another. Empathy has several levels (N. N. Obozov). The first level includes cognitive empathy, which manifests itself in the form of understanding the mental state of another person (without changing one's state). The second level involves empathy in the form of not only understanding the state of the object, but also empathy with it, i.e. emotional empathy. The third level includes cognitive, emotional and, most importantly, behavioral components. This level involves interpersonal identification, which is mental (perceived and understood), sensual (empathetic) and active. There are complex hierarchical relationships between these three levels of empathy. Various forms of empathy and its intensity can be inherent in both the subject and the object of communication. A high level of empathy determines emotionality, responsiveness, etc.

The conditions for the development of interpersonal relationships significantly affect their dynamics and forms of manifestation. In urban areas, compared to rural areas, interpersonal contacts are more numerous, quickly start up and just as quickly interrupted. The influence of the time factor is different depending on the ethnic environment: in Eastern cultures, the development of interpersonal relations is, as it were, stretched out in time, while in Western cultures it is compressed and dynamic.

2.1. Functions of communication in interpersonal relationships

The functions of communication are those roles and tasks that communication performs in the process of human social existence. The functions of communication are diverse, and there are various reasons for their classification.

One of the generally accepted classification bases is the allocation of three interrelated aspects or characteristics in communication - informational, interactive and perceptual (Andreeva G.M., 1980). In accordance with this, information-communicative, regulatory-communicative and affective-communicative functions are distinguished (Lomov BF, 1984).

The information and communication function of communication consists in any kind of information exchange between interacting individuals. The exchange of information in human communication has its own specifics. First, we are dealing with the relationship of two individuals, each of which is an active subject (as opposed to a technical device). Secondly, the exchange of information necessarily involves the interaction of thoughts, feelings and behavior of partners. Thirdly, they must have a single or similar system of message codification/decodification.

The transfer of any information is possible through various sign systems. Usually, a distinction is made between verbal (speech is used as a sign system) and non-verbal (various non-speech sign systems) communication.

In turn, non-verbal communication also has several forms:

Kinetics (optical-kinetic system, which includes gestures, facial expressions, pantomime);

Proxemics (norms for organizing space and time in communication);

Visual communication (eye contact system).

Sometimes it is separately considered as a specific sign system a set of smells that communication partners have. 3

The regulatory-communicative (interactive) function of communication is the regulation of behavior and the direct organization of the joint activities of people in the process of their interaction. A few words should be said here about the tradition of using the concepts of interaction and communication in social psychology. The concept of interaction is used in two ways: firstly, to characterize the actual real contacts of people (actions, counter-actions, assistance) in the process of joint activity; secondly, to describe the mutual influences (impacts) on each other in the course of joint activities, or more broadly - in the process of social activity.

In the process of communication as an interaction (verbal, physical, non-verbal), an individual can influence motives, goals, programs, decision-making, performance and control of actions, i.e., all components of his partner’s activity, including mutual stimulation and behavior correction.

Identification is a mental process of likening oneself to a communication partner in order to know and understand his thoughts and ideas.

The affective-communicative function of communication is associated with the regulation of the emotional sphere of a person. Communication is the most important determinant of a person's emotional states. The whole range of specifically human emotions arises and develops in the conditions of human communication - either convergence of emotional states occurs, or their polarization, mutual strengthening or weakening.

Another classification scheme of communication functions can be given, in which, along with those listed, other functions are separately distinguished: organization of joint activities; people getting to know each other; formation and development of interpersonal relationships. In part, such a classification is given in the monograph by V. V. Znakov (1994); the cognitive function as a whole is included in the perceptual function identified by G. M. Andreeva (1988). Comparison of the two classification schemes makes it possible to conditionally include the functions of cognition, the formation of interpersonal relationships, and the affective-communicative function in the perceptual function of communication as more capacious and multidimensional (Andreeva G. M., 1988). When studying the perceptual side of communication, a special conceptual and terminological apparatus is used, which includes a number of concepts and definitions and allows analyzing various aspects of social perception in the process of communication.

First, communication is impossible without a certain level of mutual understanding between the communicating subjects. Understanding is a certain form of reproduction of an object in knowledge that arises in the subject in the process of interaction with the cognized reality (Znakov V.V., 1994). In the case of communication, the object of cognizable reality is another person, a communication partner. At the same time, understanding can be viewed from two sides: as a reflection in the minds of interacting subjects of goals, motives, emotions, attitudes of each other; and how to accept these goals that allow relationships to be established. Therefore, in communication it is advisable not to talk about social perception in general, but about interpersonal perception or perception. Some researchers prefer to talk not about perception, but about the knowledge of another (Bodalev A.A., 1965, 1983).

The main mechanisms of mutual understanding in the process of communication are identification, empathy and reflection. The term "identification" has several meanings in social psychology. In the problem of communication, identification is a mental process of likening oneself to a communication partner in order to know and understand his thoughts and ideas. Empathy is also understood as the mental process of likening oneself to another person, but with the aim of “understanding” the experiences and feelings of the person being known. The word "understanding" is used here in a metaphorical sense - empathy is "affective understanding".

As can be seen from the definitions, identification and empathy are very close in content and often in the psychological literature the term "empathy" has a broad interpretation - it includes the processes of understanding both the thoughts and feelings of a communication partner. At the same time, speaking about the process of empathy, one must also keep in mind an unconditionally positive attitude towards the individual. This means two things:

a) acceptance of the person's personality in integrity;

b) own emotional neutrality, the absence of value judgments about the perceived (Sosnin V.A., 1996).

Reflection in the problem of understanding each other is an individual's understanding of how he is perceived and understood by a communication partner. In the course of mutual reflection of the participants in communication, reflection is a kind of feedback that contributes to the formation and strategy of the behavior of the subjects of communication, and the correction of their understanding of the features of each other's inner world.

Another mechanism of understanding in communication is interpersonal attraction. Attraction (from English - to attract, attract) is the process of forming the attractiveness of a person for the perceiver, the result of which is the formation of interpersonal relationships. Currently, an extended interpretation of the process of attraction is being formed as the formation of emotional and evaluative ideas about each other and about their interpersonal relationships (both positive and negative) as a kind of social attitude with a predominance of the emotional and evaluative component.

The considered classifications of communication functions, of course, do not exclude each other. Moreover, there are other types of classifications. This, in turn, suggests that the phenomenon of communication as a multidimensional phenomenon must be studied using the methods of system analysis.

2.2. Structure of communication in interpersonal relationships

In domestic social psychology, the problem of the structure of communication occupies an important place. The methodological study of this issue at the moment allows us to single out a set of fairly generally accepted ideas about the structure of communication (Andreeva G. M., 1988; Lomov B. F., 1981; Znakov V. V., 1994), acting as a general methodological guideline for organizing research.

The structure of an object in science is understood as the order of stable links between the elements of the object of study, ensuring its integrity as a phenomenon in external and internal changes. The problem of the structure of communication can be approached in different ways, both through the allocation of levels of analysis of this phenomenon, and through the enumeration of its main functions. Usually, there are at least three levels of analysis (Lomov B.F., 1984):

1. Macro level: communication of an individual with other people is considered as the most important aspect of his lifestyle. At this level, the process of communication is studied in time intervals comparable to the duration of a human life, with an emphasis on the analysis of the individual's mental development. Communication here acts as a complex developing network of relationships between an individual and other people and social groups.

2. Mesa level (middle level): communication is considered as a changing set of purposeful logically completed contacts or situations of interaction in which people find themselves in the process of current life activity at specific time periods of their lives. The main emphasis in the study of communication at this level is on the content components of communication situations - “about what” and “for what purpose”. Around this core of the topic, the subject of communication, the dynamics of communication is revealed, the means used (verbal and non-verbal) and the phases, or stages of communication, during which the exchange of ideas, ideas, experiences is carried out are analyzed.

3. Micro level: here the main emphasis is on the analysis of elementary units of communication as conjugated acts, or transactions. It is important to emphasize that the elementary unit of communication is not a change of intermittent behavioral acts of its participants, but their interaction. It includes not only the action of one and the partners, but also the related assistance or opposition of the other (for example, “question-answer”, “incitement to action - action”, “reporting information related to it”, etc.). 4

Each of the listed levels of analysis requires special theoretical, methodological and methodological support, as well as its own special conceptual apparatus. And since many problems in psychology are complex, the task is to develop ways to identify relationships between different levels and reveal the principles of these relationships.

2.3. Types of communication in the system of interpersonal relations

Interpersonal communication is associated with direct contacts of people in groups or pairs, constant in composition of participants. In social psychology, there are three types of interpersonal communication: imperative, manipulative and dialogic.

Imperative communication is an authoritarian, directive interaction with a communication partner in order to achieve control over his behavior, attitudes and thoughts, forcing him to certain actions or decisions. In this case, the communication partner is considered as an object of influence, he acts as a passive, “suffering” side. The ultimate goal of such communication - coercion of a partner - is not veiled. Orders, instructions and demands are used as means of exerting influence. You can specify a number of areas of activity where the use of imperative communication is quite effective. These areas include: relations of subordination and subordination in the conditions of military activity, relations "chief - subordinate" in extreme conditions, under emergency circumstances, etc. But it is possible to single out those areas of interpersonal relations where the use of the imperative is inappropriate. These are intimate-personal and marital relations, child-parent contacts, as well as the entire system of pedagogical relations.

Manipulative communication is a type of interpersonal communication in which the impact on a communication partner in order to achieve one's intentions is carried out covertly. Like the imperative, manipulation involves an objective perception of a communication partner, the desire to gain control over the behavior and thoughts of another person. The sphere of "allowed manipulation" is business and business relations in general. The concept of communication developed by Dale Carnegie and his followers became a symbol of this type. The manipulative style of communication is also widespread in the field of propaganda.

Dialogical communication is an equal subject-subject interaction aimed at mutual knowledge, self-knowledge of partners in communication. Such communication is possible only if a number of rules of relationship are observed:

1. the presence of a psychological attitude to the current state of the interlocutor and one's own current psychological state (following the principle of "here and now").

2. The use of non-judgmental perception of the partner's personality, a priori attitude to trust in his intentions.

3.Perception of the partner as an equal, having the right to his own opinion and decisions.

5. You should personify communication, that is, conduct a conversation on your own behalf (without reference to the opinions of authorities), present your true feelings and desires.

Dialogue communication allows to achieve a deeper mutual understanding, self-disclosure of the personality of partners, creates conditions for mutual personal growth.

The following types of communication can also be distinguished:

Formal-role communication, when both the content and the means of communication are regulated, and instead of knowing the personality of the interlocutor, knowledge of his social role is dispensed with.

Business communication is a situation where the goal of interaction is to reach a clear agreement or agreement. In business communication, the personality traits and mood of the interlocutor are taken into account, first of all, to achieve the main goal in the interests of the business. Business communication is usually included as a private moment in any joint productive activity of people and serves as a means of improving the quality of this activity. Its content is what people are doing, and not those problems that affect their inner world.

Intimate-personal communication is possible when you can touch on any topic and it is not necessary to resort to the help of words, the interlocutor will understand you by facial expressions, movements, intonation. In such communication, each participant has the image of the interlocutor, knows his personality, can anticipate his reactions, interests, attitudes. Most often, such communication occurs between close people and is largely the result of previous relationships. Unlike business communication, this communication, on the contrary, is focused around psychological problems, interests and needs, which deeply and intimately affect a person’s personality: the search for the meaning of life, the definition of one’s attitude to a significant person, to what is happening around, the resolution of any internal conflict, etc.

Secular communication. The essence of secular communication is its pointlessness, that is, people do not say what they think, but what is supposed to be said in such cases; this communication is closed, because the points of view of people on a particular issue do not matter and will not determine the nature of communications.

There is also instrumental communication, which is not an end in itself, is not independently stimulated by need, but pursues some goal other than obtaining satisfaction from the very act of communication. In contrast, targeted communication in itself serves as a means of satisfying a specific need, in this case, the need for communication.

Diagnostic communication aims to form a certain idea about the interlocutor or get some information from him. The partners are in different positions: one asks, the other answers.

Educational communication involves situations in which one of the participants purposefully influences the other, quite clearly imagining the desired result, that is, knowing what he wants to convince the interlocutor, what he wants to teach him, etc.

CONCLUSION

Communication is of great importance in the formation of the human psyche, its development and the formation of reasonable, cultural behavior. Through communication with psychologically developed people, thanks to the wide opportunities for learning, a person acquires all his higher cognitive abilities and qualities. Through active communication with developed personalities, he himself turns into a personality.

If from birth a person was deprived of the opportunity to communicate with people, he would never become a civilized, cultural and morally developed citizen, he would be doomed to remain a semi-animal until the end of his life, only outwardly, anatomically and physiologically resembling a person.

Of particular importance for the mental development of the child is his communication with adults in the early stages of ontogenesis. At this time, he acquires all his human, mental and behavioral qualities almost exclusively through communication, since until the beginning of schooling, and even more definitely before the onset of adolescence, he is deprived of the ability to self-educate and self-educate. The mental development of a child begins with communication. This is the first type of social activity that arises in ontogenesis and thanks to which the infant receives the information necessary for his individual development. In communication, first through direct imitation (vicarial learning) , and then through verbal instructions (verbal learning) the child's basic life experience is acquired.

Communication is the internal mechanism of joint activity of people, the basis of interpersonal relationships. The growing role of communication, the importance of its study is due to the fact that in modern society, much more often in direct, direct communication between people, decisions are made that were previously made, as a rule, by individuals.

REFERENCES

Andreeva G.M. Social Psychology. - M., Aspect Press, 1996. - 504s.

Brudny A.A. Understanding and communication. M., 1989. - 341s.

Zimnyaya I.A. Psychology of teaching a foreign language at school. - M., 1991. - 285s.

Krizhanskaya Yu.S., Tretyakov V.V. Grammar of communication. L., 1990. - 476s.

Labunskaya V.A. Non-verbal communication. - Rostov-on-Don, 1979. - 259s.

Leontiev A.N. Problems of the development of the psyche. - M., 1972. - 404 p.

Lomov B.F. Communication and social regulation of individual behavior // Psychological problems of social regulation of behavior, - M., 1976. - 215p.

Myers D. Social psychology. S.Pb., 1998. - 367p.

Interpersonal perception and understanding / Ed. V. N. Druzhinina. – M.: Infra-M, 1999. – 589p.

Nemov R.S. Psychology. Book 1: Fundamentals of General Psychology. - M., Enlightenment, 1994. - 502 p.

Obozov N. N. Interpersonal relationships. - L .: Publishing House of Leningrad State University, 1979. - 247 p.

Communication and optimization of joint activities. Under the editorship of Andreeva G.M. and Yanoushek Ya. - M., Moscow State University, 1987. - 486s.

Shibutani T. Social psychology. Per. from English. Rostov-on-Don, 1998. - 405s

APPENDIX

FUNCTIONS OF COMMUNICATION IN INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS

Information and communication

Regulatory-communicative

Affective-communicative

Scheme. Functions of communication in interpersonal relationships

		this is a multifaceted process of developing contacts between people, generated by the needs of joint activities.
	Causal attribution	interpretation by the subject of interpersonal perception of the causes and motives of the behavior of other people
		(Greek empatheia - empathy) comprehension of the emotional states of another person in the form of experience
	Identification	mental process of likening oneself to a communication partner in order to know and understand his thoughts and ideas.
	Understanding	it is a certain form of reproduction of an object in knowledge that arises in the subject in the process of interaction with the cognizable reality
	Reflection	the process of self-knowledge by the subject of internal mental acts and states.
	attraction	(from English - to attract, attract) a concept denoting the appearance of the attractiveness of one of them for another when a person perceives a person.
	Dialogical communication	equal subject-subject interaction aimed at mutual knowledge, self-knowledge of communication partners. Such communication is possible only if a number of rules of relationship are observed.
	manipulative communication	type of interpersonal communication in which the impact on the communication partner in order to achieve their intentions is carried out covertly problem interpersonal relations child with other children. Attitude to others people constitutes the main fabric ... but they are also realized, manifested in interaction of people. However, attitude to another, as opposed to communication... Intimate interpersonal relations Abstract >> Psychology ... interpersonal relations And interactions of people. The subject of my course work is to determine the place of communication in the structure interpersonal interactions And interactions of people ... interpersonal relations In domestic social psychology problem ... interpersonal relations (2) Abstract >> Psychology One of the most important. Problems interpersonal relations In fact, with all group ... so that two or more of people could to interact, remaining indifferent to each other ... participating in concerted action people simultaneously interact in the language of two... interpersonal relations concept and main features Abstract >> Management ... problem study interpersonal relations in the team becomes very relevant. Much is being said in the psychological press today about interpersonal interaction ... interpersonal relations in the medical team Thesis >> Psychology concept interpersonal relations. interpersonal relations of people are subjective connections arising as a result of their actual interactions and ... components influenced by others of people. Problem interpersonal relations in the team for a long time occupied ...

Feelings and emotions in interpersonal relationships

The problem of interpersonal relations in a group can be approached from different angles. You can explore the form of these relationships, their influence on the individual, on the situation in the group. And all these aspects of interpersonal relationships are important for modern practice.

Intra-group relations also have a structure. They can be determined both by a person, his position in the system of formal relations, and by the feelings that people experience for each other in the process of joint activity.

Feeling as an indicator of interpersonal relationships was considered by many psychologists (T. Shibutani, J. Moreno, A. Maslow, K. Rogers and others).

People behave according to the rules. But feelings determine features, regulate behavior.

- these are stable experiences that are associated with. They direct the mutual orientations of people. Feelings are different from emotions - subjective reactions to the influence of internal and external factors. Feelings are stronger than emotions.

Feelings have certain social functions. The social functions of feelings determine the readiness of a person for a certain way of behavior in a particular situation.

Cognitive function of the senses associated with the comprehension of the significance of this event for the person himself.

Mobilization function of the senses manifests itself in the willingness of a person to act in a certain way. Feelings determine the overall energy level of human activity.

Integrative-protective And warning function provide a choice of direction of activity, orientation in situations and relationships.

Not all interpersonal relationships are accompanied by feelings. A person may not have any feelings towards another.

If feelings are in conflict with social norms, then a person is often not aware of them. The problem of some people is that they do not quite understand what kind of feelings they experience in a given situation, if on a conscious and unconscious level the feelings do not coincide.

A person seeks to avoid negative experiences in the group.

Psychological defense mechanisms

Psychological defense mechanisms act on a subconscious level and represent a system of personality regulation aimed at eliminating negative experiences.

Every person has a normative level of psychological protection. There are individuals in whom the effect of psychological protection is excessive.

In addition to psychological defense, there are such specific violations when a person experiences relationships in a group: emotional stuckness and explosiveness. emotional stuck is a state in which an affective reaction that has arisen is fixed for a long time and affects thoughts and behavior. For example, an experienced resentment “gets stuck” for a long time in a vindictive person. explosiveness- increased excitability, a tendency to violent manifestations of affect, an inadequate reaction in strength.

In any existing relatively long period of time, one can observe emotional preferences. The American psychologist J. Moreno, considering the totality of preferences of group members, developed the world-famous theory of sociometry. Moreno believed that the psychological comfort of a person depends on his position in the informal structure of relations in a small group. The sociometric structure of a group is a set of subordinate positions of group members in the system of interpersonal relations.

System of interpersonal relations

The system of interpersonal relations includes a set of likes and dislikes, preferences and rejections of all members of the group.

sociometric status

Each individual in the group has a sociometric status, which can be defined as the sum of preferences and rejections received from other members. Sociometric status can be higher or lower depending on what feelings other members of the group experience in relation to this subject - positive or negative. The totality of all statuses defines status hierarchy in the group.

The highest status are the so-called sociometric stars- members of the group having the maximum number of positive choices with a small number of negative choices. These are the people to whom the sympathy of the majority, or at least many, of the members of the group is directed.

Next come high-status, middle-status and low-status group members defined by the number of positive choices and not having a large number of negative choices. There are groups in which there are no sociometric stars, but only high, medium, low status.

At a lower level of intergroup relations are isolated- subjects that do not have any choices, both positive and negative. The position of an isolated person in a group is one of the most unfavorable.

Outcasts are those members of the group who have a large number of negative choices and a small number of preferences. At the last rung of the hierarchical ladder of social preferences are neglected or outcast- members of the group who do not have a single positive choice in the presence of negative ones.

Often the position of a sociometric star is considered as a position of a leader. This is not entirely true, since leadership is associated with intervention in the process of action, and sociometric status is determined by feelings. It is possible to meet subjects who are both sociometric stars and leaders, but this combination is rare. A person often loses the sympathy of others, becoming a leader. A sociometric star causes a good attitude, primarily because other people feel psychologically comfortable in the presence of this person. As for the leader, his socio-psychological function is connected with management.

The problem of combining a leader and a sociometric star in one person is extremely acute both for the individual and for the group as a whole. Sometimes, in critical social situations, this can provoke some tendencies of fanatical behavior of group members. In an ordinary family, roles can be distributed as follows: the father is the leader, the mother is the sociometric star. The high-status, middle-status, and low-status members of a group usually make up the majority.

Isolated, rejected and neglected members of the group are at risk according to the criteria of interpersonal relationships. Particular attention should be paid to the position of the isolated person. In many cases, it turns out to be more unfavorable than the position of the outcast or even the neglected. A negative attitude towards a person in a group is a more favorable social factor than the absence of any attitude, since a negative incentive is better than its absence. Sometimes the transition of a person from a position of neglect to a position of isolation is considered a great punishment. There is a well-known phenomenon of the influence of a boycott - the termination of relations with a person, the lack of response to his words and deeds and the manifestations of various feelings towards him. With a boycott, a person finds himself not in the position of the neglected, to whom the negative feelings of those around him are directed, but in the position of the isolated, to which those around him are completely indifferent. Changing the sociometric status of a group member is an important problem. A person's status is often a relatively stable quantity. However, from the point of view of personality development, the immutability of the sociometric status is considered as a risk factor, even if it is a high status.

The need to change the sociometric status dictated by human needs to develop flexible behavioral strategies for social adaptation in different groups. Therefore, it is advisable to go through the various statuses. The complexity of the problem also lies in the fact that people perceive and relate to their status differently. Most have an idea of ​​what status they hold in the primary group. Average-status members of the group, as a rule, perceive their position adequately. But the extreme status categories, due to the action of psychological defenses, often perceive the attitudes of other people towards themselves inadequately. Most often it is sociometric stars and neglected members of the group who are not aware of their position in the system of interpersonal relations in the group.

The stability of sociometric status is determined by many factors, among which are the following:

• appearance (physical attractiveness, the leading modality of facial expressions, appearance design, non-verbal language);
• success in leading activities;
• some character traits and (tolerance, sociability, goodwill, low anxiety, stability of the nervous system, etc.);
• correspondence of the values ​​of the individual to the values ​​of the group of which he is a member;
• position in other social groups.

To change the status of a person in a group, sometimes it is enough just to work with one or another status factor.

Reciprocity of emotional preferences

Knowledge of the sociometric status does not provide complete information about the position of a person in the system of interpersonal relations. It is necessary to know about such a phenomenon as reciprocity of emotional preferences group members. Even a sociometric star will feel disadvantaged if her choice is not reciprocated. Conversely, a neglected member of the group may feel quite well if his choice was mutual. The more mutual choices a group member has, the more stable and favorable his position in the system of interpersonal relations will be. Groups differ considerably in the reciprocity of the choice of their members. If there are few mutual choices in the group, then there will be a weak coordination of actions and emotional dissatisfaction of its members with interpersonal relationships.

Interpersonal relationships in a group include relationships of interpersonal preference.

small group is divided into microgroups, and the larger the small group, the greater the number of microgroups in it. Each microgroup has its own sociometric structure. Often a microgroup is a group of friends with common interests. Sometimes the association of people into microgroups can be caused by other reasons, for example, belonging to a certain social stratum, etc.

Revealing the rejection system in a group is necessary to predict its actions in a situation. Rejections in a group can be grouped into three types.

The first type is normative, indicating the well-being of relations in general, when rejections are not pronounced, there are no persons who received a large number of negative choices, and all rejections are distributed relatively evenly. There are no people whose rejections would prevail over preferences.

The second type is the polarization of rejections, in which two main microgroups are distinguished that reject each other.

The third type is the most unfavorable for the group, when there will be only one outcast, acting as a defendant for all misunderstandings, the so-called "switchman". Sometimes in a group, a negative attitude towards one person on the part of the majority can be quite justified. However, such cases are considered exceptional. If the group always chooses the switchman, then we can conclude that the nature of interpersonal relations in it is unfavorable. Even if the rejected person leaves the group, a new "guilty" person will be found for the appropriate role.

Group habits in the system of interpersonal relations are formed in the same way as any other group actions.

Habit refers to a form of social control and directs the behavior of specific individuals and the group as a whole.

The most important characteristics of the system of intragroup preferences are: sociometric status, reciprocity of choice, the presence of stable groups of interpersonal preferences, and a system of rejections. Despite the equal importance of all characteristics, special attention is paid to the status of the subject. This is due to the fact that, firstly, the status has a relative social stability, and the subject often transfers it from one group to another. Secondly, it is the dynamics of the status hierarchy that entails the corresponding changes in the system of rejections and relations between microgroups. In addition, a person's understanding of his status in the system of interpersonal relations has a significant impact on the self-esteem of the individual.

Introduction

In recent decades, all over the world, more and more new scientists are involved in the development of a set of problems that make up the psychology of people knowing each other. Each scientist is interested, as a rule, in separate and particular issues related to this large complex, but together they create the prerequisites for deep penetration into the essence of the process of forming a person's knowledge of other people, as well as for a true understanding of the role of this knowledge in human behavior and activities. . The general features of the formation of the image of another person and the concept of his personality are investigated, the significance of gender, age, profession and belonging of a person to a particular social community for the education of his knowledge about other people is revealed, typical mistakes that a person makes when evaluating the people around him are revealed, connections are traced between his knowledge of himself and the understanding of other persons. Many branches of psychological science are enriched with previously unknown facts, and practitioners receive additional opportunities for more effective management of the organization of people's relationships, optimizing the process of their communication in the sphere of work, teaching, and everyday life.

Speaking about the specificity of human cognition, it is also necessary to see that this cognition, as a rule, is associated with the establishment and preservation of communications. Being a manifestation of such knowledge, the images of other people and the generalized knowledge that a person develops about them constantly depends on the goals and nature of his communications with other people, and on these communications, in turn. The activity that unites people, its content, course and results always influences.

Main part

Feelings and interpersonal roles

It has often been noted that literati give a more convincing description of human life than social psychologists. Scientists often find themselves powerless to understand what makes people human. Even in the best of their works, something seems to be missing, while Writers are primarily interested in love, friendship, passion, heroism, hatred, vengeance, jealousy and other feelings. Writers focus on describing the affective connections that are established between the characters, their development and transformation, as well as the joys, sorrows and acute conflicts that arise between people. Although these phenomena are unquestionably a central part of the drama of life, until recently social psychologists have shied away from studying them.

More than 200 years ago, a group of philosophers from Scotland - among them Adam Ferguson, David Hume and Adam Smith - argued that it is the various feelings formed and nurtured in the associations of people close to each other that distinguish man from other animals. Despite the great influence of these authors on their contemporaries, as well as the development of their ideas, the Romantics. For the next century, until very recently, this statement was ignored by social scientists. Rare exceptions, such as Cooley and McDougall, were like a voice crying in the wilderness. During the last few decades, however, interest has focused on the study of close contacts between people. Psychiatrists, who have always been interested in human relationships, were influenced by Sullivan, who stated that personality development is driven by networks of interpersonal relationships. Moreno was the first to attempt to create procedures for describing and measuring these networks and, together with his colleagues, developed various sociometric methods. Some psychologists, noting that the perception of human beings is much more difficult than the perception of inanimate objects, began to consider this process as a special field of study.

The development of interest in small groups, as well as the growing popularity of existentialism, has further drawn attention to interpersonal relationships. Although the level of knowledge in this area is still insufficient, its subject is one of the most important.

Problems of interpersonal relations

In fact, in all group activities, participants act simultaneously in two qualities: as performers of conventional roles and as unique human personalities. When conventional roles are played, people act as units of the social structure. There is agreement on the contribution that each role player must make, and each participant's behavior is constrained by culturally dictated expectations. However, being included in such enterprises, people remain unique living beings. The reactions of each of them turn out to be dependent on certain qualities of those with whom they happen to come into contact. Therefore, the nature of mutual attraction or repulsion is different in each case. Initial reactions can range from love at first sight to sudden hatred for the other person. A kind of evaluation is made, because it is completely implausible that two or more people can interact while remaining indifferent to each other. If contact is maintained, participants can become friends or rivals, dependent or independent of each other, they can love, hate or resent one another. The way each person reacts to the people associated with him forms a second system of rights and obligations. The pattern of interpersonal relationships that develop between people engaged in collaborative action creates another matrix that imposes further restrictions on what each person can or cannot do.

Even in the most fleeting interactions, there seems to be some kind of interpersonal reaction. When a man and a woman meet, there is often a mutual appreciation in erotic terms. However, educated people in such cases usually do not reveal their inner experiences. A remark about a person of the opposite sex is more often left to one of his closest friends. In most contacts that occur, such reactions are of little importance and are soon forgotten.

When people continue to communicate with each other, more stable orientations arise. Although the expression "interpersonal relations" is used in various ways in psychiatry and in social psychology, here it will be used to refer to the mutual orientations that develop and crystallize in individuals in prolonged contact. The nature of these relationships in each case will depend on the personality traits of the individuals involved in the interaction.

Since a person expects special attention from his closest friends and is not inclined to expect good treatment from those whom he does not like, each party in the system of interpersonal relations is bound by a number of special rights and obligations. Everyone plays a role, but such interpersonal roles should not be confused with conventional roles. Although both types of roles can be defined based on group expectations, there are important differences between them. Conventional roles are standardized and impersonal; rights and obligations remain the same regardless of who fills these roles. But the rights and obligations that are established in interpersonal roles depend entirely on the individual characteristics of the participants, their feelings and preferences. Unlike conventional roles, most interpersonal roles are not specifically trained. Everyone develops his own type of treatment with a partner, adapting to the requirements that the particular individuals with whom he comes into contact make to him.

Although no two systems of interpersonal relationships are exactly the same, there are recurring situations, and similar personalities respond in the same way to the same kind of treatment. Therefore, it is not surprising that typical patterns of interpersonal relationships are observed and that interpersonal roles can be named and defined. Thus, collaborative situations may include colleague, partner, supplier, client, admirer, love object, and so on. Interpersonal roles that arise when people compete over similar interests may include rival, enemy, conspirator, and ally. If a person tries to mediate between those who disagree, he becomes an arbitrator. Another recurring situation can be described as the power of one side over the other. If such dependency is maintained by agreement, legitimate authority is established and those in a dominant position assume the role of a figure in power. But the actual ability to direct the behavior of others is not always in the hands of those whose conventional role is invested with power. A child, for example, who knows how to take advantage of his anxious parents' momentary outburst can control their behavior. Among the interpersonal roles that arise from the uneven distribution of power are the leader, hero, follower, puppet, and patron. Although patterns for the performance of these roles are developed in each group, the latter are analytically different from conventional roles because in this case each person assumes a certain role due to his personal qualities.

In every organized group, there is a common understanding of how members are supposed to feel about each other. In the family, for example, the relationship between mother and sons is conventionally defined. However, within this cultural framework, there are many options for actual relationships. It is not unusual for mothers to hate or envy their children openly, disobey and constantly contradict. The three sons of the same mother may be oriented toward her differently, and despite her best efforts to be impartial, she may find herself constantly preferring one over the other. The feelings that are supposed to arise often do, but in many cases, no matter how hard people try, they cannot feel the way they are supposed to. Outwardly they conform to group norms, but inwardly everyone knows that the appearance maintained is only a façade.

So, people participating in a coordinated action simultaneously interact in the language of two systems of gestures. As performers of conventional roles, they use conventional symbols that are the object of social control. At the same time, however, each actor's particular personality orientation is manifested in his style of performance, as well as in what he does when the situation is not well defined and he has some freedom of choice. The manifestation of personality traits, in turn, causes responses, often unconscious. If a person feels that his partners are contributing in a way that is not completely sincere and sincere, he may be offended, or disappointed, or even begin to despise them - depending on the characteristics of his character.

Our interests are concentrated on more or less long-term bonds that are established between separate individuals. Whatever the association, people enter into highly personalized relationships that impose special rights and obligations on them, regardless of conventional roles. When a person loves someone, he becomes close to his beloved, turns a blind eye to his shortcomings and rushes to help when necessary. But he doesn't feel obligated to do the same for someone he doesn't love. On the contrary, he will feel even better if he turns aside to give him trouble. To the extent that such tendencies are established, the system of interpersonal relations can be seen as another means of social control. The challenge facing social psychologists is to construct an adequate conceptual framework for studying these phenomena.

Feelings as systems of behavior

The basic analytical unit for the study of interpersonal relationships is feeling. In everyday life, we talk about love, hate, envy, pride or resentment as "feelings" that arise from time to time in someone "in the heart."

As Adam Smith pointed out long ago, feelings differ from other meanings in that they are based on empathy. A sympathetic identification with the other person arises: she is recognized as a human being, a creature capable of making choices, experiencing suffering, enjoying joy, having hopes and dreams, in general, reacting in much the same way as he himself could react in similar circumstances. As Buber pointed out, recognizing another person as "You" rather than "It" involves thinking of him as a being endowed with qualities much like my own. So, feelings are based on the attribution of properties that a person finds in himself. A person resents the actions of a superior. If he attributes sadistic tendencies. But he sympathizes with the similar actions of another person, if he believes that he could not have done otherwise. Therefore, feelings are based on the ability to accept the role of a certain person, to identify with him and to determine the situation from his particular point of view. Because people vary greatly in their ability to empathize, there are individual differences in the ability to experience feelings.

When empathy is absent, even human beings are seen as physical objects. Many of the social contacts that take place in a big city are devoid of sentiment. The bus driver, for example, is often treated as if he were just an appendage of the steering wheel. Even in sexual relations - one of the most personal forms of interaction between individuals - it is possible to perceive the other person as "You" or as "It". The researchers note that prostitutes usually perceive visitors as inanimate objects, only as a source of livelihood. In contrast to such relationships, many of these women have lovers. Psychologically, there are completely different types of interaction, and only the second brings satisfaction. The essential thing here is that certain qualities are projected onto the object, allowing some kind of sympathetic identification to be established. It follows that certain conventional roles, such as executioner or soldier in battle, can be performed more effectively if feelings are absent.

These feelings vary greatly in intensity. The latter depends, at least in part, on how contradictory the orientations of one person are in relation to another. For example, falling in love reaches its highest intensity in situations where there is a conflict between erotic impulses and the need to restrain oneself out of respect for the object of love. Probably, hatred reaches its greatest intensity when there is some ambivalence. This is confirmed by the fact that a person is much more suspicious of a traitor than an enemy. Like other meanings, feelings, once they have arisen, tend to stabilize. The stability of such orientations is revealed especially in the event of the death of a close being. With reason, a person accepts the fact of this death, but for some time he can replace the missing communication with interaction with personification. Relatively stable personifications are constantly reinforced due to the selectivity of perception. Each person willingly justifies those whom he loves: having noticed the unseemly act of a friend, he concludes that either it seemed to him, or there were some excusing circumstances for this. But the same person is not at all so generous to people whom he does not love: he approaches them, preparing for the worst. Even a completely innocent remark on their part can be interpreted as a hostile attack. Therefore, most people manage to make the same assessment of each of their acquaintances almost regardless of what they actually do. Of course, if a person constantly acts contrary to expectations, sooner or later people will revise their assessments. But there are significant individual differences in the ability to change attitudes towards people. Some are so inflexible that they are unable to notice signals that strongly contradict their hypotheses. Despite repeated setbacks, they continue to do as before - until the catastrophe forces them to carry out a "painful reassessment" of the relationship.

Since the study of the senses is only now taking the broad road, it is not surprising that few techniques have been developed for observing them. Materials about how people relate to each other are collected through intensive interviews, through observation in a pre-prepared situation, and through various tests.

Structure of typical feelings

Each feeling is a meaning that develops in a successive series of adjustments to the demands of living with a particular individual. Since both subject and object are unique, no two senses can be exactly the same; and yet we have no difficulty in recognizing typical feelings. Typical feelings are an integral part of repetitive interpersonal relationships, and they can be seen as ways of playing common interpersonal roles. At some time, each person is in the power of another or, conversely, has another in his power. Often he finds himself forced to compete with someone. In such situations, typical interests are formed, typical re-onifications are constructed, and typical assessments of other people arise. This means that many feelings are similar enough to be able to formulate some generalizations.

The systematic study of feelings makes it difficult to make value judgments. In the United States, where romantic attraction is seen as a necessary basis for marriage, it is widely believed that there can be only one true love in any individual's life. When various metabolic transformations occur when meeting an attractive member of the opposite sex, many young people spend agonizing hours wondering if this mystical experience has really come. Love is given a very high value: there is a tendency to associate it with God, the fatherland, or some noble ideals. Likewise, hatred and violence are almost universally condemned. All this makes it difficult to impartial study of various feelings. Often the actual situation is mixed with conventional norms. People tend to overlook or deny tendencies that they disapprove of.

In embarking on a more objective study, one should start by looking at how people evaluate each other, and refuse to evaluate feelings as such. In order to describe the few feelings that come to the fore in popular psychiatric theories, it seems best to start with a limited number of the most obvious types of orientation.

All kinds of unifying, conjunctive, feelings usually arise when people pursue common interests, and the achievement of collective goals brings some satisfaction to everyone. The participants in such situations are mutually dependent, for the consummation of the impulses of one depends on the contributions made by others.

In such circumstances, the other party is seen as the desired object. Each constant source of satisfaction acquires a high value. Lovers and comrades are cherished, such a person is cared for, rewarded, protected, and in some cases even promoted to the maximum development of his abilities. Such feelings range in intensity from mild preference to deep devotion—like a lover who is completely consumed by another person, a mother who gives up her life to her only child, or a believer who forgets himself for the sake of godly love of God.

The Western intellectual tradition has long made a distinction between two types of love. The Greeks called love for another because of its usefulness Eros, and love for the sake of the person himself - Aqape. Based on this distinction, in the Middle Ages, theologians contrasted human love - which was usually seen as having an erotic basis - with divine love. Emphasis was placed on the distinction between an orientation in which the object of love is an instrument and an orientation in which it is an end in itself. The lover may be primarily interested in his own satisfaction or in the satisfaction of the object. This distinction has recently been revived by psychiatry in order not to call two different feelings by the same word.

Possessive love is based on an intuitive or conscious understanding of the fact that one's own satisfaction depends on cooperation with another person. This other is personified as an object, valuable because of its usefulness. They coddle him, for it is in their own interest to look after his well-being. This type of feeling is characterized by a specific pattern of behavior. A person usually rejoices when he is with the object of love, and sad when he is absent. If the object is attacked in any way, the person shows rage towards the attacker; he protects the object from danger, although the degree to which he will risk himself is not unlimited. If the object attracts others, the person experiences jealousy. However, since the interest is centered on its own satisfaction, it may not even notice the object's frustration and pain.

Selfless love, on the other hand, suggests that the personification acquires the highest value without regard to the lover, as in the case commonly called motherly love. The main interest here is focused on the well-being of the object of love. Accordingly, the pattern of behavior differs: joy at the sight of some kind of satisfaction from the object of love and grief when he is offended or sick. And if someone harms the object of love or humiliates him, there is rage against the aggressor. At the sight of danger, a person experiences fear and can take a hit on himself. Saving him, he can even sacrifice himself. Therefore, as Shand distinguishes, the difference between possessive and unselfish love is that the latter is self-centered; joy, grief, fear or anger arise depending on the circumstances in which it is not so much the lover himself, but the object of "love". Both types of feelings are called "love" because the object is assigned a high value, but in the second case the lover is more interested in the object than in himself. The general tendency is to seek identification with the object, and some psychiatrists believe that the goal in this type of relationship is complete merging with the object.

Hatred is a feeling, it is known, apparently, to everyone. A person is upset if the object of hatred is healthy and prosperous, he feels rage and disgust in his presence, he exults when he fails, and feels anxiety when he succeeds. Because these impulses are usually frowned upon, they are often held back. But they show up in expressive movements - in a quick smile when the hated person stumbles, a grimace of disgust when he succeeds, or an indifferent shrug of the shoulders when he is in danger. It is sometimes said that a person cannot hate those whom he knows intimately. In reality, this is not so. If the social distance is reduced, there are much more opportunities for the development of hatred. Indeed, perhaps the most intense form of hatred is vindictiveness, which develops when a person turns his anger against someone whom he previously loved and trusted.

Not all people who submit to domination believe that this arrangement is fair. Some obey only because they have no other choice. For such people, the dominant side becomes a frustrating object and causes feelings such as resentment or resentment. The resentment pattern is rarely expressed openly, but the offended personifies the other as a person who does not really deserve respect. He willingly notes all his mistakes and mistakes, and if he feels that he can get away with it, he proceeds to open defiance. Once formed, such feelings can persist even after the unpleasant relationship is over. As adults, children who have resented parental authority sometimes become hostile to authorities of any kind.

Attitudes towards various feelings, established in daily life, can be easily understood. Conjunctive feelings are favorable for the optimal development of participants and facilitate the implementation of various joint undertakings. The general approval of these sentiments is not unexpected. On the contrary, the development of disjunctive feelings almost always proves to be a hindrance in the life of the group, and their common condemnation is just as understandable.

Personal differences in feelings

Individuals vary greatly in their ability to play interpersonal roles, and each has developed a distinctive way of engaging in a network of interpersonal relationships. Some people love people, find pleasure in communicating with them and quite sincerely enter into a joint venture. Others contribute cautiously: they make efforts only when the partners also fulfill their responsibilities. Still others do their duty only if someone is watching them or when it is clear that this is for their direct benefit. They believe that only stupid and stupid people can work enthusiastically for someone else. Finally, there are those who are not able to cope with any duties at all.

Conflicts of one kind or another are inevitable in the life of any person, and each develops a characteristic way of dealing with the enemy. Some are outspoken; they state their demands directly and, if necessary, engage in physical combat. Others avoid the break at all costs by focusing on behind-the-scenes maneuvering.

Since feelings are what one individual means to another, each of them is, by definition, individual. But a given person's feelings for several different persons may have much in common, lending a certain style to his attitude towards people in general. Indeed, some seem to be incapable of experiencing certain feelings. For example, since friendship requires trust without any guarantees and the person remains open to possible exploitation, some choose not to enter into such a relationship at all. Others are unable to participate in disjunctive relationships. If they are attacked, they "turn the other cheek" and wait patiently until their tormentors come to their senses.

Moreover, there are people who are unable to understand certain feelings on the part of others. Even when they observe the corresponding actions, they cannot believe that others are really so oriented.

Feelings are orientations based on personifications, which are constructed mainly by ascribing motives. To attribute a motive means to draw a conclusion about the inner experiences of another person. We can only assume that others are similar enough to ourselves and try to understand their behavior by projecting our own experiences onto them. But a person cannot project experiences that he has never experienced. If he has never felt a sense of personal security, can he really understand the gullible acts of another? Rather, he will look for some hidden motives. Conversely, for those who believe that all people are basically “good”, it is very difficult to understand the actions of a person who is at war with the whole world. This shows that the type of interpersonal relationship in which a given individual may be involved is determined by his personality.

Individual characteristics in the ability to perform interpersonal roles are also based on differences in empathy - the ability to sympathetically identify with other people. It is common for some people to maintain social distance; they always seem cold and rational. Others perceive others very directly, reacting spontaneously to their difficulties and joys. An attempt to build a scale to measure empathy was made by Diamond.

There is a lot of speculation about the foundations of friendship; some research has been done on clique formation, but the data obtained so far is not conclusive. It has been shown, for example, that the development of common interests, especially those that go beyond the necessary interaction, facilitates the establishment of friendly ties. But another hypothesis can be proposed: the formation of any private network of interpersonal relationships, as well as its stability, depend on how much the individuals included in it complement each other in some respect. Two aggressive and power-hungry people are unlikely to experience mutual affection: each needs his own group of dependent followers. Sometimes such people find themselves bound by conventional norms - when they establish a modus vivendi, but continue to compete with each other. Relationships are disjunctive, and this limits favorable opportunities from the very beginning. When a condescending person becomes the object of hero worship by those who are obedient and dependent, a very satisfactory relationship is established. Sometimes people make the most incredible combinations and desperately cling to one another. A sensitive but not very perceptive person may devote himself entirely to a love object that is not very responsive - as in the case of a parent's attachment to a child, an owner to a dog, or a mental hospital employee to a catatonic patient.

Some feelings, like imagined chivalrous love for movie stars, are one-sided. Their structure develops in an organization where the dreamer can control all the conditions of action. A person creates such objects of love, combines all the desired qualities, including reciprocity. These idealized personifications sometimes become the object of the strongest unselfish attachment. Feelings thus organized can be subsequently transferred to real human beings - often to their dismay, for real people cannot live up to the expectations of a frustrated imagination. This inevitably leads to disappointment. Some people seem to spend their whole lives looking for the perfect marriage partner, corresponding to personifications created in dreams.

Observations of this kind led Winch to develop a theory of mate choice in terms of "complementary needs". He believed that although the field of choosing a partner for marriage is limited by conventional barriers and usually partners belong to the same culture, but within this field each person strives for those whose personality traits facilitate the consummation of impulses inherent in him as a unique personality. Winch was interested, of course, only in societies in which young people choose their own spouses. In a preliminary study of 25 married couples, he found significant support for his theory. Indeed, he managed to identify four frequently repeated combinations:

A) families resembling the conventional mother-son relationship, where a strong and capable woman takes care of a husband who needs someone to lean on;

B) families where a strong, capable husband takes care of a passive and compliant wife, in many ways similar to a small doll who needs to be nursed;

C) families resembling the conventional relationship of master and maid, in which an indulgent husband is served by a capable wife;

D) families in which an active woman dominates a frightened and disappointed husband.

The degree of correlation found by statistical analysis is sufficient, although not high; this is not surprising, since many other considerations are taken into account when choosing a spouse. It is possible that the results would have been more satisfying if Winch had focused on marriages that endure as opposed to those that fail.

So, feelings that create some kind of private networks of interpersonal relationships can be one-sided, two-sided or mutual. In most cases, feelings are two-sided; each side approaches the other somewhat differently. For example, in some family, the mother may be altruistically oriented towards her husband and children; on the contrary, her husband is possessive of his daughters and dislikes his son, treating him as a rival competing with him for his wife's attention. One of their daughters may love her sister, who, however, will treat her with contempt. A boy may approach his sisters as useful tools to achieve his goals, treat his mother with deep affection, and look at his father as a hero who is at times harsh and unpleasant. This is not such an unusual picture. The duration of such relationships seems to depend on mechanisms that provide some sort of mutual satisfaction for those involved in this network of relationships.

Conclusion

In fact, all common approaches to social psychology explain human behavior almost exclusively in terms of the biological properties of people, as they are molded in the cultural matrix. The child is born into an organized society and, interacting with others, learns various models of appropriate behavior. What a person does is often seen as a response to needs, some of which are inherited organically, while others are acquired through participation in a group. But a serious question may arise as to whether such conceptual schemes are adequate. By entering into stable associations, people often become involved in networks of interpersonal relationships that impose on them special responsibilities towards each other. Feelings are systems of behavior that are not biologically inherited and are not learned. They take shape and crystallize as individual human beings adjust to each other.

Each feeling is unique, because it is a peculiar attitude of one human individual to another. But among people in a stable association, the same problems inevitably arise. As a person learns to interact with others, typical personifications develop, and specific meanings - love, hate, hero worship, jealousy - become definite enough to make it possible to consider typical feelings. Each participant in the joint action is sympathetic to some of those around him and causes hostility to others. An attempt has been made to describe some conjunctive and disjunctive feelings. This pattern of drives and rejections forms a web of personal obligations that largely determines the behavior of the individuals involved. The sustainability of any such network of interpersonal relationships depends on a continuous stream of satisfaction for the majority of participants.

Since people involved in the study of intimate contact have different intellectual backgrounds, it is not surprising that there is a lot of confusion in this area. A vast literature is rapidly accumulating, but there is no agreement on anything other than that the subject in question deserves serious study. One of the main obstacles to the systematic study of feelings is the lack of an adequate category system. In addition, common sense terminology, with its irrelevant and confusing associations and value judgments, makes this study even more difficult. Describing interpersonal relationships in terms such as "Love", "Hate" and "Jealousy" is much like a chemist would say "water", "fire" and "air" instead of "oxygen", "hydrogen" etc. However, this area is so important for understanding human behavior that, despite all the difficulties, every effort should be made to study it. There is no shortage of observations or theories. However, in order not to be premature, one should try to organize the material obtained from various sources into a sufficiently coherent scheme. Perhaps for some time the study of the senses will remain unprofessional and speculative, but even a timid beginning may shed some light on the complex problems that present such serious difficulties even for the construction of hypotheses.

In the process of interpersonal relationships, people do not just communicate, they do not just act together or next to each other, they influence each other, form a certain style of relationship. In an effort to imitate the good, avoid the bad, comparing himself with others, a person "builds himself and his relationship with the outside world."

Bibliographic list

1. Bodalev A.A. Personality and communication. - M., 1983.

2. Shibutani T. Social psychology. Per. from English. V.B. Olshansky. - Rostov-on-Don: Phoenix, 1998. - S. 273-279.

3. Jerome S. Bruner and Renato Taqiuri, The Perception of People, b Lindzey, op. cit., Vol. II.

5.C.H. Rolph, ed., Women of the Streets, London, 1955.

6 French, op cit.; Leary, op. cit; Osqood et al., op cit.

7. Huqo G. Beiqel, Romantie Love, American Socioqical Review, XVI (1958).

8. Karen Horney, On Feelind Abused, "American Journal of Psychoanalysis" XI (1951).

9. Henry H. Brewster, Grief: A. Disrupted Human Relationship, "Human Orqanization", IX (1950).

10. Nelson Foote, Love, Psyehiatry, XIV (1953).

12. Henry V. Dicks, Clinical Studies in Marriaqe and the Familu, "British Journal of Medical Psycholoqy", XXVI (1953).

13. Rosalind F. Dymand, A. Scale for the Measurement of Empathic Abilfty, Joumalof Consultinq Psycholoqy, XIII (1949).

14. Howard Rowland, Friendship Patterns in the State Mental Hospital, Psychiatry, II (1939).

15. Robert F. Winch, Mate-Selection: A Study of Complementary Needs, New York, 1958.

Psychology of interpersonal relationships

For the first time in Russian literature, interpersonal (interpersonal) relationships were analyzed in 1975 in the book Social Psychology.

The problem of interpersonal relations in domestic and foreign psychological science has been studied to a certain extent. The monograph by N. N. Obozov (1979) summarizes the results of empirical studies of domestic and foreign specialists. This is the most profound and detailed study and currently retains its relevance. In subsequent publications, little attention is paid to the problem of interpersonal relations. Abroad, this problem is analyzed in reference books on social psychology. The most interesting joint study by T. Huston and G. Levinger is "Interpersonal attractiveness and interpersonal relationships" (Huston, Levinger, 1978), which has not lost its significance at the present time.

Many works are now appearing in the press that deal with the problems of interpersonal and business contacts (business communication) and give practical recommendations for their optimization (Deryabo and Yasvin, 1996; Evening, 1996; Kuzin, 1996). Some of these publications are a popular presentation of the results of psychological research, sometimes without references and a list of references.

The concept of interpersonal relationships. Interpersonal relations are closely related to various types of social relations. G. M. Andreeva emphasizes that the existence of interpersonal relations within various forms of social relations is the realization of impersonal (social) relations in the activities of specific people, in the acts of their communication and interaction (Andreeva, 1999).

Public relations are official, formally fixed, objectified, effective connections. They are leading in the regulation of all types of relations, including interpersonal ones.

Interpersonal relationships- these are objectively experienced, to varying degrees, perceived relationships between people. They are based on a variety of emotional states of interacting people. Unlike business (instrumental) relationships, which can be both officially fixed and loose, interpersonal relationships are sometimes called expressive, emphasizing their emotional content. The relationship of business and interpersonal relations in scientific terms is not well developed.

Interpersonal relations include three elements - cognitive (gnostic, informational), affective and behavioral (practical, regulatory).

cognitive element involves awareness of what one likes or dislikes in interpersonal relationships.

affective aspect finds its expression in various emotional experiences of people about the relationships between them. The emotional component is usually the leading one. “These are, first of all, positive and negative emotional states, conflict states (intrapersonal, interpersonal), emotional sensitivity, satisfaction with oneself, partner, work, etc.” (Obozov, 1979, p. 5).

The emotional content of interpersonal relationships (sometimes called valency) changes in two opposite directions: from conjunctive (positive, bringing together) to indifferent (neutral) and disjunctive (negative, separating) and vice versa. Variants of manifestations of interpersonal relationships are huge. Conjunctive feelings are manifested in various forms of positive emotions and states, the demonstration of which indicates a readiness for rapprochement and joint activity. Indifferent feelings suggest manifestations of a neutral attitude towards a partner. This includes indifference, indifference, indifference, etc. Disjunctive feelings are expressed in the manifestation of various forms of negative emotions and a state that is regarded by the partner as a lack of readiness for further rapprochement and communication. In some cases, the emotional content of interpersonal relationships can be ambivalent (contradictory).

Conventional manifestations of emotions and feelings in the forms and methods characteristic of those groups whose representatives enter into interpersonal contacts can, on the one hand, contribute to mutual understanding of those who communicate, and, on the other hand, hinder interaction (for example, if the communicants belong to different ethnic, professional, social and other groups and use various non-verbal means of communication).

Behavioral the component of interpersonal relations is realized in specific actions. If one of the partners likes the other, the behavior will be friendly, aimed at helping and productive cooperation. If the object is not cute, then the interactive side of communication will be difficult. Between these behavioral poles there are a large number of forms of interaction, the implementation of which is determined by the socio-cultural norms of the groups to which the communicants belong.

Interpersonal relationships are built along the "vertical" (between the leader and subordinates and vice versa) and "horizontal" (between persons occupying the same status). Emotional manifestations of interpersonal connections are determined by the socio-cultural norms of the groups to which the communicants belong, and by individual differences that vary within these norms. Interpersonal relationships can be formed from positions of dominance-equality-submission and dependence-independence.

social distance implies such a combination of official and interpersonal relations, which determines the proximity of those communicating, corresponding to the sociocultural norms of the communities to which they belong. Social distance allows you to maintain an adequate level of breadth and depth of relationships when establishing interpersonal relationships. Its violation leads initially to disjunctive interpersonal relations (up to 52% in power relations, and up to 33% in equal-status relations), and then to conflicts (Obozov, 1979).

Psychological distance characterizes the degree of closeness of interpersonal relations between communication partners (friendly, comradely, friendly, trusting). In our opinion, this concept emphasizes a certain stage in the dynamics of the development of interpersonal relations.

Interpersonal Compatibility- this is the optimal combination of the psychological characteristics of partners, contributing to the optimization of their communication and activities. As equivalent words, "harmonization", "consistency", "consolidation", etc. are used. Interpersonal compatibility is based on the principles of similarity and complementarity. Its indicators are satisfaction with the joint interaction and its result. The secondary result is the emergence of mutual sympathy. The opposite phenomenon of compatibility is incompatibility, and the feelings caused by it are antipathy. Interpersonal compatibility is considered as a state, process and result (Obozov, 1979). It develops within the space-time framework and specific conditions (normal, extreme, etc.) that influence its manifestation. To determine interpersonal compatibility, hardware and technical methods and a homeostat are used.

Interpersonal attractiveness- this is a complex psychological property of a person, which, as it were, “attracts” a communication partner and involuntarily arouses in him a feeling of sympathy. The charm of a person allows her to win over people. The attractiveness of a person depends on his physical and social appearance, ability to empathize, etc.

Interpersonal attractiveness contributes to the development of interpersonal relationships, causes a cognitive, emotional and behavioral response in a partner. The phenomenon of interpersonal attractiveness in friendly couples is thoroughly disclosed in the studies of N. N. Obozov.

In scientific and popular literature, such a concept is often used as "emotional attraction"- the ability of a person to understand the mental states of a communication partner and especially to: empathize with him. The latter (the ability to empathize) is manifested in the responsiveness of feelings to various states of the partner. This concept is somewhat narrower than "interpersonal attractiveness".

In our opinion, interpersonal attractiveness has not been studied scientifically enough. At the same time, from applied positions, this concept is studied as a phenomenon of the formation of a certain image. In domestic science, this approach has been actively developed after 1991, when there was a real need for psychological recommendations for the formation of the image (image) of a politician or a business person. Publications on this issue provide advice on creating an attractive image of a political figure (in appearance, voice, use of verbal and non-verbal means of communication, etc.). Specialists on this problem appeared - image makers. For psychologists, this problem seems promising.

Taking into account the practical significance of the problem of interpersonal attractiveness in educational institutions where psychologists are trained, it is advisable to introduce a special course "Formation of the image of a psychologist". This will allow graduates to better prepare for their future work, look more attractive in the eyes of clients and establish the necessary contacts.

The concept of "attraction" is closely related to interpersonal attractiveness. Some researchers consider attraction as a process and at the same time the result of the attractiveness of one person for another; identify levels in it (sympathy, friendship, love) and associate it with the perceptual side of communication (Andreeva, 1999). Others believe that attraction is a kind of social attitude, in which a positive emotional component prevails (Gozman, 1987). V, N. Kunitsyna understands attraction as the process of preferring some people to others, mutual attraction between people, mutual sympathy. In her opinion, attraction is due to external factors (the degree of severity of a person's need for affiliation, the emotional state of communication partners, the spatial proximity of the place of residence or work of those communicating) and internal, actually interpersonal determinants (physical attractiveness, demonstrated behavior style, similarity factor between partners, expression of a personal relationship to a partner in the process of communication) (Kunitsyna, Kazarinova, Pogolsha, 2001). As can be seen from the foregoing, the ambiguity of the concept of "attraction" and its overlapping with other phenomena makes it difficult to use this term and explains the lack of research in domestic psychology. This concept is borrowed from Anglo-American psychology and is covered by the domestic term "interpersonal attractiveness". In this regard, it seems appropriate to use these terms as equivalent.

Under the concept "attraction" understands the need of one person to be together with another who has certain characteristics that receive a positive assessment of the perceiver. It denotes an experienced sympathy for another person. Attraction can be unidirectional and bidirectional (Obozov. 1979). Opposite concept "repulsion" (negation) associated with the psychological characteristics of the communication partner, which are perceived and evaluated negatively; Therefore, the partner causes negative emotions.

Personality features that affect the formation of interpersonal relationships. A favorable prerequisite for the successful formation of interpersonal relationships is the mutual awareness of partners about each other, formed on the basis of interpersonal knowledge. The development of interpersonal relationships is largely determined by the characteristics of those who communicate. These include gender, age, nationality, temperament properties, health status, profession, experience in communicating with people and some personal characteristics.

Floor. The peculiarity of interpersonal relations between the sexes is manifested already in childhood. Compared to girls, boys are more active in contacts, participate in collective games, and interact with peers even in childhood. This pattern is also observed in adult men. Girls tend to communicate in a narrower circle. They establish relationships with those they like. The content of the joint activity is not very important for them (for boys, on the contrary). Women have a much smaller social circle than men. In interpersonal communication, they experience a much greater need for self-disclosure, the transfer of personal information about themselves to others. More often they complain of loneliness (Kon, 1987).

For women, the features that are manifested in interpersonal relationships are more significant, and for men - business qualities,

In interpersonal relationships, female steel is aimed at reducing social distance and establishing psychological closeness with people. In friendships, women emphasize trust, emotional support, and intimacy. “Friendships among women are less stable. The intimacy inherent in female friendship on a very wide range of issues, the discussion of the nuances of one's own relationships complicates them ”(Kon, 1987, p. 267). Divergence, misunderstanding and emotionality undermine women's interpersonal relationships.

In men, interpersonal relationships are characterized by greater emotional restraint and objectivity. They open up more easily to strangers. Their style of interpersonal relations is aimed at maintaining their image in the eyes of a communication partner, showing their achievements and claims. In friendships, men record a sense of camaraderie and mutual support.

Age. The need for emotional warmth appears in infancy and with age gradually turns into a varying degree of awareness of the psychological attachment of children to people who create psychological comfort for them (Kon, 1987, 1989). With age, people gradually lose the openness inherent in youth in interpersonal relationships. Numerous sociocultural norms (especially professional and ethnic ones) are superimposed on their behavior. The circle of contacts is especially narrowed after the entry of young people into marriage and the appearance of children in the family. Numerous interpersonal relationships are reduced and manifested in the industrial and related spheres. In middle age, as children grow older, interpersonal relationships expand again. In older and advanced age, interpersonal relationships acquire weight. The ego is explained by the fact that children have grown up and have their own attachments, active labor activity ends, the social circle narrows sharply. In old age, old friendships play a special role.

Nationality. Ethnic norms determine sociability, the framework of behavior, the rules for the formation of interpersonal relationships. In different ethnic communities, interpersonal ties are built taking into account the position of a person in society, gender and age status, belonging to social strata and religious groups, etc.

Some properties temperament influence the formation of interpersonal relationships. It has been experimentally established that choleric and sanguine people easily establish contacts, while phlegmatic and melancholic people have difficulty. Consolidation of interpersonal relationships in pairs "choleric with choleric", "sanguine with sanguine" and "choleric with sanguine" is difficult. Stable interpersonal connections are formed in pairs of "melancholic with phlegmatic", "melancholic with sanguine" and "phlegmatic sanguine" (Obozov, 1979).

Health status. External physical defects, as a rule, negatively affect the "I-concept" and ultimately make it difficult to form interpersonal relationships.

Temporary illnesses affect the sociability and stability of interpersonal contacts. Diseases of the thyroid gland, various neuroses, etc., associated with increased excitability, irritability, anxiety, mental instability, etc. - all this, as it were, “rocks” interpersonal relationships and negatively affects them.

Profession. Interpersonal relationships are formed in all spheres of human life, but the most stable are those. that result from joint labor activity. In the course of performing functional duties, not only business contacts are consolidated, but also interpersonal relationships are born and develop, which later acquire a multilateral and deep character. If by the nature of professional activity a person has to constantly communicate with people, then he has the skills and abilities to establish interpersonal contacts (for example, lawyers, journalists, etc.).

Experience with people promotes the acquisition of sustainable skills and abilities of interpersonal relationships based on social norms of regulation with representatives of different groups in society (Bobneva, 1978). The experience of communication allows you to practically master and apply a variety of norms of communication with different people and form social control over the manifestation of your emotions.

Self-esteem. Adequate self-assessment allows a person to objectively assess their characteristics and correlate them with the individual psychological qualities of a communication partner, with the situation, choose the appropriate style of interpersonal relationships and correct it if necessary.

Inflated self-esteem introduces elements of arrogance and condescension into interpersonal relationships. If a communication partner is satisfied with this style of interpersonal relations, then they will be quite stable, otherwise they become tense.

Low self-esteem of the individual forces her to adapt to the style of interpersonal relationships that are offered by a communication partner. At the same time, this can introduce a certain mental tension into interpersonal relationships due to the internal discomfort of the individual.

The need for communication, establishing interpersonal contacts with people is a fundamental characteristic of a person. At the same time, there are people among people whose need for trusting communication (affiliation) and mercy (altruism) is somewhat overestimated. Friendly interpersonal relationships are most often formed with one person or several persons, and affiliation and altruism, as a rule, manifest themselves to many people. Research results show that helping behavior is found in people who have empathy, a high level of self-control and tend to make independent decisions. Indicators of affiliative behavior are positive verbal statements, prolonged eye contact, friendly facial expressions, increased manifestation of verbal and non-verbal signs of consent, confidential phone calls, etc. relations. In the course of the research, personal qualities that make it difficult development of interpersonal relationships. The first group included narcissism, arrogance, arrogance, complacency and vanity. The second group includes dogmatism, a constant tendency to disagree with a partner. The third group included duplicity and insincerity (Kunitsyna, Kazarinova, Pogolsha, 2001)

The process of forming interpersonal relationships. It includes the dynamics, the mechanism of regulation (empathy) and the conditions for their development.

The dynamics of interpersonal relationships. Interpersonal relationships are born, consolidated, reach a certain maturity, after which they can weaken and then stop. They develop in a continuum, have a certain dynamics.

In his works, N. N. Obozov explores the main types of interpersonal relationships, but does not consider their dynamics. American researchers also identify several categories of groups based on the proximity of interpersonal relationships (acquaintances, good friends, close friends and best friends), but they analyze them somewhat in isolation, without revealing the course of their development (Huston, Levinger, 1978).

The dynamics of the development of interpersonal relations in the time continuum goes through several stages (stages): acquaintance, friendly, comradely and friendly relations. The process of weakening interpersonal relations in the "reverse" direction has the same dynamics (transition from friendly to comradely, friendly and then there is a termination of relations). The duration of each stage depends on many components of interpersonal relationships.

Dating process is carried out depending on the socio-cultural and professional norms of the society to which the future communication partners belong.

friendly relations form readiness - unpreparedness for the further development of interpersonal relations. If a positive attitude is formed among the partners, then this is a favorable prerequisite for further communication.

Companionship enable interpersonal contact. Here there is a rapprochement of views and support for each other (at this stage, such concepts as “act in a comradely way”, “comrade in arms”, etc.) are used. Interpersonal relationships at this stage are characterized by stability and certain mutual trust. Numerous popular publications on the optimization of interpersonal relationships give recommendations on the use of various techniques that allow you to arouse the disposition, sympathy of communication partners (Snell, 1990; Deryabo, Yasvin, 1996; Kuzin, 1996),

When researching friendship (trust) relationship the most interesting and profound results were obtained by I. S. Kon, N. N. Obozov, and T. P. Skripkina (Obozov, 1979; Kon, 1987, 1989; Skripkina, 1997). According to I. S. Kohn, friendships always have a common substantive content - a commonality of interests, goals of activity, in the name of which friends unite (combine), and at the same time imply mutual affection (Kon, 1987).

Despite the similarity of views, the provision of emotional and activity support to each other, there may be certain disagreements between friends. It is possible to single out utilitarian (instrumental-business, practically effective) and emotionally expressive (emotional-confessional) friendship. Friendly relations manifest themselves in various forms: from interpersonal sympathy to mutual need for communication. Such relationships can develop both in a formal setting and in an informal one. Friendly relations, in comparison with comradely ones, are characterized by greater depth and trust (Kon, 1987). Friends frankly discuss with each other many aspects of their life, including the personal characteristics of communicating and mutual acquaintances.

An important characteristic of friendships is trust. T. P. Skripkina in her research reveals the empirical correlates of people's trust in other people and in themselves (Skripkina, 1997).

Interesting results on the problem of trusting relationships were obtained in a study conducted under the supervision of V. N. Kunitsyna on a student sample. “Confidence relationships in the surveyed group prevail over dependency relationships. A third of the respondents define their relationship with their mother as trusting, partnership; more than half of them believe that, for all that, dependency relationships often arise with their mother, while relationships with a friend are assessed only as trusting and partnership. It turned out that the relationship of dependence with one significant person is often compensated by building partnerships with another significant person. If, in the course of gaining experience, a person has formed insufficient hope for establishing close relationships with people, then relationships of trust and support often arise with a friend than with a mother ”(Kunitsyna. Kazarinova, Pogolsha, 2001). Friendships can be weakened and terminated if one of the friends fails to keep the secrets trusted to him, does not protect the friend in his absence, and is also jealous of his other relationships (Argyle, 1990).

Friendly relations in young years are accompanied by intense contacts, psychological richness and greater significance. At the same time, a sense of humor and sociability are highly valued.

Adults in friendships value responsiveness, honesty, and social accessibility more. Friendships at this age are more stable. “In active middle age, the emphasis on psychological intimacy as the most important sign of friendship weakens somewhat and friendships lose their halo of totality” (Kon, 1987, p. 251),

Friendships among the older generation are mostly associated with family ties and people who have the same life experience and values ​​with them.

The problem of criteria for friendly relations has not been studied enough. Some researchers refer to them as mutual assistance, fidelity and psychological closeness, others point to the competence in communicating with partners, caring for them, actions and predictability of behavior.

Empathy as a mechanism for the development of interpersonal relationships. Empathy is the response of one person to the experiences of another. Some researchers believe that this is an emotional process, others - an emotional and cognitive process. There are conflicting opinions about whether a given phenomenon is a process or a property.

N. N. Obozov considers empathy as a process (mechanism) and includes cognitive, emotional and effective components in it. According to him, empathy has three levels.

The hierarchical structural-dynamic model is based on cognitive empathy (first level), manifested in the form of understanding the mental state of another person without changing their state.

The second level of empathy involves emotional empathy, not only in the form of understanding the state of another person, but also empathy and sympathy for him, empathic response. This form of empathy includes two options. The first is connected with the simplest empathy, which is based on the need for one's own well-being. Another, transitional form from emotional to effective empathy, finds its expression in the form of sympathy, which is based on the need for the well-being of another person.

The third level of empathy- the highest form, including cognitive, emotional and behavioral components. It fully expresses interpersonal identification, which is not only mental (perceived and understood) and sensual (empathetic), but also effective. At this level of empathy, real actions and behavioral acts are manifested to provide assistance and support to a communication partner (sometimes such the style of behavior is called helping). There are complex interdependencies between the three forms of empathy (Obozov, 1979). In the above approach, the second and third levels of empathy (emotional and effective) are quite convincingly and logically substantiated. At the same time, its first level (cognitive empathy, associated with understanding the state of other people without changing one's state), is, in our opinion, a purely cognitive process.

As evidenced by the results of experimental studies in Russia and abroad, sympathy is one of the main forms of manifestation of empathy. It is due to the principle of similarity of certain biosocial characteristics of communicating people. The principle of similarity is presented in numerous works by I. S. Kon, N. N. Obozov. T, P. Gavrilova, F, Haider, T. Newcomb, L. Festinger, C. Osgood and P. Tannenbaum.

If the principle of similarity is not manifested in those who communicate, then this indicates the indifference of feelings. When they have a discrepancy and especially a contradiction, this leads to disharmony (imbalance) in cognitive structures and leads to the appearance of antipathy.

As the results of research show, most often interpersonal relationships are based on the principle of similarity (similarity), and sometimes on the principle of complementarity. The latter is expressed in the fact that, for example, when choosing comrades, friends, future spouses, etc., people unconsciously, and sometimes consciously, choose such persons who can satisfy mutual needs. Based on this, positive interpersonal relationships can develop.

The manifestation of sympathy can intensify the transition from one stage of interpersonal relationships to another, as well as expand and deepen interpersonal relationships. Sympathy, like antipathy, can be unidirectional (without reciprocity) and multidirectional (with reciprocity).

Very close to the concept of "empathy" concept "synthotost", which is understood as the ability to join the emotional life of another person, due to the need for emotional contact. In the domestic literature, this concept is quite rare.

Various forms of empathy are based on a person's sensitivity to their own and other worlds. In the course of the development of empathy as a personality trait, emotional responsiveness and the ability to predict the emotional state of people are formed. Empathy can be conscious to varying degrees. It can be possessed by one or both communication partners. The level of empathy was experimentally determined in the studies of T. P. Gavrilova and N. N. Obozov. Persons with a high level of empathy show interest in other people, are plastic, emotional and optimistic. Persons with a low level of empathy are characterized by difficulties in establishing contacts, introversion, rigidity and self-centeredness.

Empathy can manifest itself not only in real communication between people, but also in the perception of works of fine art, in the theater, etc.

Empathy as a mechanism for the formation of interpersonal relationships contributes to their development and stabilization, allows you to provide support to a partner not only in ordinary, but also in difficult, extreme conditions, when he especially needs it. Based on the mechanism of empathy, emotional and business imposing becomes possible.

Conditions for the development of interpersonal relationships. Interpersonal relationships are formed under certain conditions that affect their dynamics, breadth and depth (Ross, Nisbett, 1999).

In urban conditions, compared with rural areas, there is a rather high pace of life, frequent changes in places of work and residence, and a high level of public control. As a result - a large number of interpersonal contacts, their short duration and the manifestation of functional-role communication. This leads to the fact that interpersonal relationships in the city make higher psychological demands on the partner. In order to maintain close ties, those who communicate often have to pay with the loss of personal time, mental overload, material resources, etc.

Studies abroad show that the more often people meet, the more attractive they seem to each other. Apparently, and vice versa, the less often acquaintances meet, the faster interpersonal relations between them are weakened and terminated. Spatial proximity especially affects interpersonal relationships in children. When parents move or children move from one school to another, their contacts usually cease.

Important in the formation of interpersonal relationships are the specific conditions in which people communicate. First of all, this is due to the types of joint activities, during which interpersonal contacts are established (study, work, recreation), with the situation (normal or extreme), ethnic environment (mono- or multi-ethnic), material resources, etc.

It is well known that interpersonal relationships develop rapidly (go through all stages up to trust) in certain places (for example, in a hospital, train to others). This phenomenon, apparently, is due to a strong dependence on external factors, short-term joint life activity and spatial proximity. Unfortunately, comparative studies on interpersonal relationships in these conditions are not very many in our country.

The significance of the time factor in interpersonal relationships depends on the particular socio-cultural environment in which they develop (Ross, Nisbett, 1999).

The time factor influences differently in the ethnic environment. In Eastern cultures, the development of interpersonal relations is, as it were, stretched out in time, while in Western cultures it is “compressed”, dynamic. Works representing studies of the influence of the time factor on interpersonal relationships are almost never found in our literature.

To measure various aspects of interpersonal relationships, there are numerous methods and tests. Among them are the diagnostics of interpersonal relations by T. Leary (dominance-submission, friendliness-aggression), the Q-sorting method (dependence-independence, sociability-non-sociability, acceptance of struggle-avoidance of struggle), the test of behavior description by C. Thomas (rivalry, cooperation , compromise, avoidance, adaptation), J. Moreno's method of interpersonal preferences for measuring sociometric status in a group (preference-rejection), A. Megrabyan and N. Epstein's questionnaire of empathic tendencies. V. V. Boyko’s empathic abilities level method, I. M. Yusupov’s method for measuring the level of empathic tendencies, V. N. Kunitsyna’s author’s methods, V. Azarov’s questionnaire method for studying impulsiveness and volitional regulation in communication, V. F. Ryakhovsky and others.

The problem of interpersonal relations in domestic and foreign psychological science has been studied to a certain extent. There is very little scientific research on interpersonal relationships at present. Promising problems are: compatibility in business and interpersonal relationships, social distance in them, trust in different types of interpersonal relationships and its criteria, as well as the peculiarity of interpersonal relationships in various types of professional activities in a market economy.

3.7. Psychology of interpersonal influence

Rice. five. A systems approach to interpersonal impact

Subject of psychological influence(Fig. 5, subject) can act as an organizer, performer (communicator) and researcher of his process of influence. The subject can be one person or a group.

The effectiveness of the impact depends on gender, age, social status, material and information resources and many other components of the subject, and most importantly, on his professional and psychological readiness to influence his communication partner.

At St. Petersburg University, V. M. Pogolsha conducted a study to identify the psychological properties of a person, allowing her to successfully influence. The following properties were taken as the basis for identifying personality types (according to the ability to exert personal influence): aggressiveness-friendliness, emotional instability-self-regulation, sociability-isolation, risk motive-motive for avoiding failure, authoritarianism-partnership, frustration, conflict, impulsiveness, adaptability, empathy, exhaustion, activity, and self-awareness factors such as self-respect and self-control. After processing the results, a complex of communicative and personal properties was established, including ease of communication, communication skills, adaptability, confidence, active position in interaction, achievement motive, affiliation, understanding of the interlocutor and social intelligence. According to V. M. Pogolsha, the above properties constitute, to a certain extent, the “charisma” of the individual, which allows her to successfully influence. Based on the selected criteria, she established four main and three compensatory types, whose representatives have a personal impact on people in different ways. An interesting conclusion is made by V. M. Pogolsha about the coincidence of the personality traits of a leader and a complex of socio-psychological characteristics that are the potential of a subject who successfully exerts personal influence (Kunitsyna, Kazarinova, Pogolsha, 2001).

The subject of interpersonal influence studies the object and the situation in which the influence is carried out; chooses strategy, tactics and means of influence; takes into account the signals coming from the object about the success or failure of the impact (feedback); organizes opposition to the object (with its possible counter-influence), etc. In the event that the recipient (object of influence) does not agree with the information offered to him and seeks to reduce the effect of the influence exerted on him, the communicator has the opportunity to use the laws of reflexive control or manilulative influence.

Object of psychological influence(Fig. 5, object). In the object, the object of influence is often singled out, that is, those phenomena that are directed by psychological influence. These include beliefs, motives, value orientations, etc., and in a group of people - the psychological climate, intergroup tension, etc. The object, being an active element of the system of influence, processes the information offered to it and may not agree with the subject, and in some cases and to carry out a counter-influence on the communicator, i.e. act as a subject. The object correlates the information offered to him by the communicator with his existing value orientations and his life experience, after which he makes a decision. The characteristics of the object that affect the effectiveness of the impact on him include his gender, age, nationality, profession, education, experience of participation and communication exchange of information and other features. Sometimes not only one person, but also a group can act as an object. In the latter case, the process of exerting influence becomes more complex.

Interpersonal Impact Process(Figure 5, process). The process of psychological impact (influence) will, in turn, be a multidimensional system that includes strategy, tactics, dynamics, means, methods, forms, arguments and criteria for the effectiveness of impact.

Strategy- these are the ways of the subject's action to achieve the main goal of psychological impact on the recipient. Two main types of psychological influence strategy can be designated as monologue and dialogic (Ball, Burgin, 1994). The subject of influence, guided by a monologic strategy, behaves as if only he were a full-fledged subject and bearer of truth, and the recipient is only an object of influence. He himself, as a rule, regardless of the preferences of the recipient, sets the goal of the impact. As for the process of exposure, often the subject is forced to ensure its effectiveness, taking into account the characteristics of the recipient. Within the framework of the monological type of strategy, two half-types are distinguished - imperative and manipulative. At imperative strategy the desired result of the impact is directly indicated by the subject, the understanding and implementation of the instruction of which should be directed by the activity of the recipient. At manipulative strategy the purpose of the impact is not directly proclaimed, but is achieved through the formation by the subject of the impact of the activity of the recipient in such a way that it unfolds in the desired direction for him (Dotsenko, 1997).

V.M. Poholska defines manipulation as a type of psychological influence used to achieve a unilateral gain. Signs of manipulative influence include the desire to put a communication partner in a certain dependence, easily or difficultly fixed deceit and hypocrisy (obsession, desire to please, a feeling of reticence, etc.) and a call to unite against someone (Be friends against someone!). For these purposes, intrigue and the desire to quarrel a partner with a third person are used. When communicating with the manipulator, it is recommended to adhere to a logical and expectant position (to gain time, identify a manipulative strategy and find an adequate solution), maintain composure and tact, perform non-stereotypical actions that do not meet the opponent’s expectations, offer the manipulator a joint solution to the problem, etc. In general, the main the factor of resistance to external pressure and manipulation is personal potency, which is resistance to external influence and at the same time the power of influencing people (Kunitsyna, Kazarinova, Pogolsha, 2001)

In contrast to the manipulative strategy, dialogical (developing) strategy proceeds from the recognition of the subjective usefulness and fundamental equality of the interacting partners and therefore seeks to abstract from all sorts of differences between them.

Tactics- this is the solution of intermediate tasks of psychological influence through the use of various psychological techniques. The tactics of influence are determined by its tasks. All tactics can be divided into two main groups of short-term and long-term effects.

With adequate intensity, the impact can more or less fix the consciousness of the recipient, affect his emotions and encourage him to correct his behavior (Bodalev, 1996).

Means of influence can be verbal and non-verbal (paralinguistic and extralinguistic). Compared to other elements of the process, the means of influence are the most variable. With their adequate selection, they can ensure the effectiveness of the impact. Choice is the key to success argument systems, convincing for the recipient, based on real life conditions and taking into account the psychological characteristics of the object (Mitsich, 1987). The argumentation system may include ideological evidence, information characterizing the way of life, etc. As for the use non-verbal means of influence, then in general they should be adequate to the object, subject and conditions of influence.

TO influence methods include persuasion and coercion (at the level of consciousness), suggestion, infection and imitation (at an unconscious level of the psyche). The last three methods are socio-psychological.

Belief[In the psychological and pedagogical literature, the concept of "belief" is used in three ways, firstly, as knowledge that is part of the worldview; secondly, as the main method of psychological influence on the consciousness of the individual, and thirdly, as a process of influence] in relation to psychological influence, it can perform several functions: informational, critical and constructive. Depending on the personality of the object, their significance is different. The information function depends on the degree of awareness of the recipient on the subject (problem, issue) of the impact. The critical function is to evaluate the views, opinions, stereotypes of the value orientation of the object. The role of this function is especially important in disputes, discussions, etc., i.e., in the process of persuading the recipient. The constructive function is manifested in the formation of new views, approaches and attitudes in the object. Persuasion compared to persuasion is a more complex, time-consuming and psychologically painful process for the recipient, since he breaks down established views and ideas, destroys old ones and forms new ones. In this regard, the communicator has to spend much more psychological and other resources on the process of influence. “In persuading people, great caution, tolerance, benevolence and tact are required, because it is quite difficult for a person to part with his convictions even when he understands their failure and fallacy” (Afonin, 1975, 43).

Compulsion as a method of influence has two modifications: physical and moral-psychological coercion. The first is related to the use of physical or military force and will not be considered by us. The second modification is manifested, for example, in managerial or educational practice. The method of coercion, from a psychological standpoint, essentially coincides with the method of persuasion. In both cases, the task of the communicator is to make the recipient accept his offer. In both persuasion and coercion, the subject substantiates his point of view with the help of evidence. The main feature of the method of coercion, in comparison with persuasion, is that the basic assumptions with which this thesis is substantiated potentially contain negative sanctions for the object. The latter correlates possible negative consequences with his system of value orientations. In practice, this is interpreted by the object as a definition of the subjective meaning of meanings (Leontiev, 1985). And only in the case when the grounds by which the recipient proves the expediency of accepting proposals are subjectively presented to him as having the opportunity to destroy the hierarchy of values ​​that he has, the object makes the decision that is offered to him,

Recently, using the method of coercion, trainings with negative reinforcement or punishment have become widespread, which are based on various warnings, censures and fines for undesirable behavior (for example, in order to deter involuntary behavioral acts, punishments with emetic drugs and even weak electric shocks are used). Such aversion procedures and techniques are quite controversial: they have both supporters and opponents.

Under suggestion (suggestion) is understood as a purposeful, unreasoned impact based on an uncritical perception of information. This method has long attracted the attention of scientists, in connection with which a large number of studies have been carried out on it. Suggestion is actively used in pedagogical and medical practice, in military affairs, in the media, etc. The effectiveness of suggestion depends on the characteristics of the subject and object, and especially on relationships that develop between them. The presence of a positive attitude of the object in relation to the subject contributes to the optimization of the impact. The effectiveness of inspiring influence can be achieved by increasing the prestige of the subject (for example, it is not a party representative who speaks, but its leader), repeating the influence in various modifications and reinforcing the content with logically thought out and convincing (from the point of view of the recipient) evidence. This is explained by the fact that the object's existing alertness to suggested information will be destroyed by weighty arguments. If the recipient's resistance is high, then the evidence should be more convincing and affect his feelings.

Infection It consists in the unconscious and involuntary exposure of people to certain mental states. Infection has integrative and expressive functions. The first is used to strengthen the solidity of the group (for example, in Nazi Germany, members of the Hitler Youth were forced to collectively listen to recordings of the Fuhrer's speeches and sing Nazi songs), the second is associated with the removal of mental tension. The expressive function of infection is clearly manifested at spectacular events. The influence of the method of infection can also be observed with a successful joke of the speaker (speaker). In this case, smiles, laughter, a cheerful mood are vividly transmitted among the people present, creating a major mood in them. Infection has different effectiveness depending on the excellent and business qualities of the object (such as, for example, restraint, a high level of self-control, etc.). Infection has always been successfully used by leaders of various religious movements and denominations. A certain kind of emotional state is easily spread among the masses of people who come to a religious meeting. This makes them more suggestible and manageable.

Imitation consists in the conscious or unconscious following of the object's manner of behavior or the example of the subject of influence. Imitation is actively used, for example, in pedagogical and managerial activities. Following the models of decent behavior of teachers and managers allows you to form high personal and business qualities in students or subordinates. The effectiveness of imitation depends on age, gender, personal and business qualities of the subject and object, the relationship between them, and many other characteristics.

Based on the methods of imitation, contagion and suggestion in neurolinguistic programming, the techniques of "mirroring" and "synchrony" have been developed. The procedure of "mirroring" (mirroring) consists in borrowing and copying (during training exercises) from a communication partner (or from a leading coach) body movements, postures, gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice, pronunciation of words and sentences (this exercise is actively used in many training programs). The effect of "synchrony" is manifested in a connection between the bodily rhythms of the listener and the speaker that is difficult to observe. In interpersonal interaction, the speaker, as it were, “dances” with his body to the beat of his speech, and the listener moves to the beat of the speaker, thereby providing a reverse invisible but felt emotional relationship. “Synchrony is maximum when the communicants are in a state of agreement or dialogue with each other. It is minimal in case of dispute and conflict between them” (Kovalev, 1995). The use of the gaming and other techniques mentioned above contributes to the development of the individual's ability to influence and establish relationships with other people (Marasanov, 1995).

Forms of interpersonal influence can be speech (written and oral), visual and demonstrative. The selection of these forms is necessary for scientific analysis and the development of specific recommendations for optimizing the psychological impact in practical work. Oral (speech), visual and especially demonstrative forms are most easily perceived. The choice of forms is determined by many factors: the objectives of the impact, the personal and business qualities of the object and the subject, the material and financial resources of the subject, etc.

Argumentation system involves abstract evidence and concrete information. Studies show that the most effective is factual and numerical information that is easier to remember and compare. As a criterion for the effectiveness of an argument (the value of its contribution to the final product of interaction), a measure of the convergence of the positions of the participants in the conversation can be used. An indirect evidence of the effectiveness of the argument is the improvement in relations between the interlocutors, the increase in their trust in each other (Gaida, 1987; Shibutani, 1998; Andreeva, Bogomolova, Petrovskaya, 2001). It is advisable to take into account the principles of selection and presentation of information (conclusiveness and satisfaction of the information needs of a particular object), as well as communication barriers (cognitive, socio-psychological, etc.).

Criteria for the effectiveness of the impact can be strategic (delayed in the future, for example, ideological) and tactical (intermediate), which guide the subject in the process of influencing a partner (for example, speech statements, facial expressions, etc.). As intermediate criteria for the effectiveness of interpersonal influence, the subject can use a change in the psychophysiological, functional, paralinguistic, verbal, proxemic and behavioral characteristics of the object. It is desirable to use the criteria in the system, comparing their intensity and frequency of manifestation.

Terms impacts include the place and time of communication, the number of participants in communication who are affected (Ross, Nisbett, 1999).

Control questions and tasks:

1. What is a systematic approach to interpersonal perception?

2. What features of the subject influence his perception of people?

3. What are the components of the physical and social appearance of the perceived person?

4. By what signs can you determine that a new acquaintance (acquaintance) is behaving sincerely or, conversely, insincerely (for example, is engaged in self-presentation)?

5. What mechanisms of interpersonal cognition distort the image of a perceived person?

6. What differences exist between the mechanisms of interpersonal cognition?

8. Analyze what mechanisms you have that can distort interpersonal cognition.

9. List the main classification schemes of communication functions, reveal their content.

10. Highlight the mechanisms of people's cognition that you most often manifest.

11. After watching a video, a movie, describe 1-2 characters using a systematic approach to the perception of the physical and social appearance of a person.

12. What are interpersonal relationships?

13. What is the relationship between the concepts of "social distance" and "psychological distance"?

14. Please describe how various personality traits affect the development of interpersonal relationships.

15. What are the differences between the concepts of "interpersonal and emotional

attractiveness", "attraction" and "attraction"?

16. Describe the dynamics of interpersonal relationships and its manifestation in theory and life.

17. What is the essence of empathy and how does it manifest itself?

18. Describe the role of various conditions in the development of interpersonal relationships.

19. Analyze what your features influence the formation of interpersonal relationships.

20. Analyze your level of empathy (preferably using one of the techniques).

21. Compare the theoretical knowledge presented in the paragraph with your experience in the formation of interpersonal relationships.

22. Describe what constitutes a psychological impact.

23. What characteristics of the subject of psychological influence affect the effectiveness of interpersonal influence?

24. What features of the object must be taken into account when exerting a psychological impact on it?

25. Describe the structural elements of the process of psychological impact.

26. Describe the methods of psychological influence.

27. Analyze, with the help of theoretical concepts, how you carry out a psychological impact on your environment.

28. Think about and highlight your potential, which can be used to increase the effectiveness of the psychological impact on your partner.

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