Here are examples of good responses to insults: If he...

• Says behind your back: “If you have something to say, say it to my face, not behind my back.” (If they say: “I have nothing to say”...) “Wow, you can’t do it yourself! Why should I be afraid of you? Or/and “You know, I don’t care what you think or say about me, but I don’t like the fact that others might think badly of me because of you. I’m tired of all this, I’m really tired of it, and I won’t leave it like that.” (You can end the argument at this point.)
• Calls you names: “Give me one reason why you say that?” (Ask only when he calls you unreasonably, and if he cannot answer, laugh and...) “You say that I (insulting word) and What, you’re not even able to give a reason for this? Perhaps you should think a hundred times before calling names?”

Smart responses to insults: if someone says that...

• You are a loser: “Even if I am a loser, you have no right to judge me! And why did you drop everything and watch me? Have nothing else to do? Oh, this just proves once again that I am much better than you! Or “Oh well, at least I don’t have to put on buckets of makeup to look good.”
• You (insulting word): “You know what, I don’t go up to people and call them (insulting word) because it’s just beneath me. Therefore, the fact that you allow yourself to call me that tells me that you are the most ignorant, tactless and illiterate person I have ever seen.”
• You are a waste of time: (sometimes pick out an important quote/word from what he says and use it against him, it will make him look stupid) “If I am such a waste of your time, then why are you wasting it on me now? You seem to spend more time discussing my personal life behind my back than your own. So I think now is the time to get out of my life and get on with yours.” (We can finish here).
• He is better than you: “Are you better than me? Why then do you put so much effort into humiliating me if I’m already worse? You have a terrible character, it needs to be changed, and immediately. Otherwise you will never have friends."
• How to end a quarrel:
  • “I have more important things to do than think about what you say about me. What you do and say in relation to other people does not fit into any framework. You are self-confident and don't care about anyone but yourself. You are not a person, you are a black hole that sucks the life out of people, I am disgusted with you. I don't want to waste a second of my time on you. I don’t treat people the way you do, because I know that by insulting people, you show that you are such an insignificant person.”
  • This will help show the person that you are much smarter than them.

Useful tips

No one wants to just put up with the rudeness and rudeness that can be heard in public transport, at work, online, and just on the street.

There is no need to play the role of the victim, but learn to react correctly to aggression towards you.

Obviously, for most people, being rude to them can have a negative impact. influence well-being, self-esteem and performance.

How to respond to rudeness

To be able to respond to rudeness, you first need to work on increasing your self-esteem.

It is worth noting that it is not easy to be rude to a person with a strong spirit.

And yet, if you urgently need to know how to communicate with a boor, then you can use one or more methods of struggle.

Responses to rudeness

Calm

When talking to such people, you should never show them that you are confused. Try to express your point of view frankly, firmly and openly.

Try not to get defensive and speak calmly and relaxed.

Most often, rude people are weak, envious people who have difficulty getting used to honesty and calmness, and sometimes do not know these words at all. They take energy for their negativity from precisely those people who succumb to rudeness and begin to get nervous. Don't let them "feed" on your nervousness.

Sneezing

This method is more suitable as a reaction to prolonged rudeness.

If the person who is rude to you cannot stop, you may well be able to help him do so.

First, try listening to him calmly until he is convinced that he is right. After this, sneeze loudly and demonstratively - there will be a short pause, during which you calmly say the phrase: "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." and politely add: "So where did you end up?"

Aikido

Simply put: you give me, I give you. This method transfers your interlocutor’s negativity onto himself. You just need to agree with his attacks against you, thank him for the time and effort spent emphasizing your shortcomings.

You can even praise your interlocutor for his attentiveness and the “advice” that you heard. Do this calmly and try not to show the caustic nature of your phrases.

It is worth noting that the more witnesses to the conflict, the better for you, because a rude person is unlikely to receive the necessary approval from the outside, and will most likely cause laughter and jokes in his address.

Boringness

This method can be used by administrators of forums, websites, blogs and social groups. networks.

Despite the fact that most community members are familiar with the general rules, some still deliberately violate them, after which they express dissatisfaction with the fact that their access was denied in private messages to administrators.

After all the arguments are over, these characters move on to outright rudeness and rudeness.

The easiest way is to simply ban, but if you want to prove that you are right, try without emotions, describe in detail all the offender’s mistakes. At first, the interlocutor will resist and continue to “have fun” with rudeness, but when he realizes that they are communicating with him dryly, without emotion, he will simply leave behind.

Ignoring

Perhaps the most famous and simple method of dealing with rudeness. Sometimes silence is not only effective and safe, but also beautiful.

If you don’t need anything from a rude person, or you are simply not psychologically ready to enter into a debate with him, or if the “interlocutor” is simply out of his mind and can harm your health, just ignore him. Rude people want to win your attention, don't give them this joy.

It is worth noting that you also need to ignore correctly. No need to include an offensive look and sighs- these are signals that you paid attention to him. Don't show any emotions, a boor is nothing to you.

How to respond beautifully to rudeness

There are several phrases that can be used when you are confronted with a rude person:

"Sorry, is that all?"

"I thought better of you"

"Rudeness doesn't suit you very well"

"Do you want a polite answer or the truth?"

"Why are you trying to look worse than you really are?"

“Like everyone else, I also have bad days. Don’t be upset, everything will work out for you.”

“Yes, of course, go ahead. May luck be on your side” (in case someone jumps in line)

"This role doesn't seem to suit you. What do you really want?"

"Thank you for showing interest in me"

"Do you want to offend me? Why?"

How to respond to insult

If you are accidentally or intentionally cursed, you should not take these words literally and take everything personally.

Understand that if the person who insulted you is in a bad mood or is simply not well brought up, this does not mean that everything is your fault.

In order to be able to react correctly to insults, you need, first of all, to know that the person who insults you in every possible way is himself a victim, namely a victim of the obstinacy of his character.

Most often, those who “attack” and try to humiliate others are weak individuals who are simply not able to cope with negative emotions, which prompts them to throw it all out on others.

What to do in response to an insult

If you are insulted by a stranger

The best option is to ignore it. Just try not to notice the one who is trying to insult you. Of course, there are times when you need to act differently, but most often you need to act as if the stranger is not there, and his words are an empty sound.

If you were insulted by a loved one

From the very beginning, try to dot all the I's. You should calmly and directly tell him that the words spoken hurt you. The right step would be to discuss the situation.

If you were insulted by a work colleague/boss

Under such circumstances, try to carefully avoid the conflict. If a co-worker tirelessly insults you and keeps you silent doesn’t help, try responding with a neutral barb.

In the case of a boss, conflicts are not needed, which means do not respond to insults. Instead, imagine your manager as a petulant, pugnacious little child.

In your head, pat him on the head, feed him porridge and help him sit on the potty. This is exactly the method that psychologists recommend. Not only will you survive the insults, but you will also be in a good mood, or at least it will make you smile and increase your productivity. In addition, the boss may also pay attention to your durability.

How to respond to an insult

The person who is trying to insult you wants to assert himself, to stand out, which means you need to give him a cold answer: “Well, have you asserted yourself at my expense?”

When listening to such a person, try to understand what the goal is, why they want to insult you.

* If you don’t know how to respond to an insult, then you need to know one important thing - no wellit is possible to reach the point of mutual insults and rash reactions.

Besides the fact that it may look stupid, you are also susceptible to manipulation, which may end in a trap for you. You don't have to play by the rules that are imposed on you.

*Another main rule - respond to rudeness calmly without losing your self-esteem. But it is worth noting that the cultural response to the “attack” of a boor most often does not produce any effect, because the game takes place on someone else's territory and not according to your rules.

* When it comes to trolling, or other similar situations, it is best ignore the offender.

* It happens that you need to answer, but you know that all your arguments simply will not work against a stubborn rude person. In this case, the best option would be turn around and leave.

* The person who insulted you or is trying to do so may simply be having a bad day. Therefore, from you it will be enough to ask: "Bad day?" . If a person is adequate, he will agree and may even ask for forgiveness.

But, if it comes to a troll, then such a question is not only inappropriate, but can also lead to additional insults towards you.

* Most often, responding to an insult is not a good strategy, and you can get away with it only by neutrally asking the person what he just said to you. Try to pretend that you didn't hear his words or didn't pay attention to them. In this case, only an outright boor will continue his “attacks”.

* If you find yourself in a situation where it is simply necessary to respond to the offender, or you are strangled by the desire to do so, do not rush at him. The main thing is to be calm, cold in words and expressions. It is advisable to silence insults with witty remarks and only after the interlocutor has finished his monologue.

* Sometimes an insult is more like a mockery. In this case, perhaps the best option would be to answer in the form of a joke, which not only will not offend the person, but will also maintain a normal relationship.

One of the common mistakes that people make is an attempt to justify themselves, they say, "no, you're wrong, it's not my fault". Firstly, such a strategy can make you humiliated, and secondly, trying to justify yourself is simply pointless, because... As a rule, no one listens to excuses.

Inconvenient questions

“How much does it cost?”, “When are you getting married?”, “What is your salary?”- these questions are annoying, and despite the fact that asking them is bad manners, some still cannot restrain themselves.

There are several situations you can consider, but first let’s note a few universal answers.

How to answer in an original way

- “I am amazed at your ability to ask questions that can baffle you!”

- “You are an amazing woman (man). I have always been amazed by your ability to ask uncomfortable (correct, difficult, rhetorical) questions!”

- “I’ll be happy to try to answer your question, just answer first, why are you so interested in this?”

- “For what purpose are you interested in this?”

- “Do you really want to talk about this?” If the answer is yes, then simply answer: "And I'm not very good" - and end the dialogue with a smile.

If you don’t really like the person and you have no desire to communicate with him, especially after an incorrect question, you can answer coldly: "It's my damn business."

- Ask again: “I understand correctly that...”

Questions about money

When you are faced with an unpleasant question, you have every right not to give the other person any specific answer. For example, to the question "How much do you earn?" you can avoid answering “Like most, the average salary in the industry (significantly less than Abramovich).”

You can also answer this question with a counter question. For example, to the question "How much is the jacket?" You can ask your interlocutor how much his jacket costs. Another way to answer this question is significantly overestimate or underestimate the figure and then turn the conversation into a joke.

Questions about work

“What do you do?”, “What do you do at work?”

When answering such questions, psychologists advise naming the profession that can give you more confidence in what you do. If your job is different, you do a lot of different things, you can sort all the work for a month into sections. This way you will know what takes the most time.

Questions about your personal life

“Why isn’t there a girl (boyfriend)?”, “When is the wedding?”, “Why haven’t you gotten married yet?”

You shouldn't take such questions seriously. In response, you can ask your interlocutor why such an unusual question came to his mind. In this case, the interlocutor will find himself in an awkward situation.

There is another option - just answer directly as it is. For example, to the question "Why one more (one)?" Proudly admit that you are patiently looking for your soul mate, who would not leave you in difficult times.

The third option would be "mirroring". For example, "Am I correct in understanding that you don't mind holding a candle over my bed?" , or "...what, today, is your main task to discuss my personal life?" , or "...is interest in other people's troubles normal for you?"

How to respond to rudeness

Boors can be found everywhere. These are people who often experience pressure on themselves, which leads to rudeness as a weapon of defense.

Why are they rude?

Reason 1: Despair

A person is not having a good day - so he is rude. For example, a saleswoman who is tired from the whole working day, a client, a colleague who is brought to stress.

Most often, such people, after throwing out all their anger at someone, feel guilty and may even apologize.

If you decide in such a situation to respond with the same weapon, then the feeling of guilt will go away and the person will think that being rude is normal.

Reason 2: Self-affirmation

When a boor humiliates another person, he feels superior to him, especially if this person, for one reason or another, cannot fight back the offender.

Usually such boors have, albeit not great, but still power. They believe that they can just take their anger out on those who depend on them and get away with it unpunished.

Reason 3: The desire to be noticed

If rudeness is an integral part of a person, then its roots can be hidden in childhood.

A child always wants attention and love from his parents. If he does not receive this, then he begins to be rude so that at least some attention will be paid to him. As a person ages, he uses the same strategy.

Responses to rudeness

Method 1: Don't take everything said to you personally.

Often a person who is rude does not do it specifically to you - rather, it is anger at the world in general: ill-mannered youth, men are assholes, etc. and only the brute himself is white and fluffy.

One can only sympathize with such a boor, because... the world he lives in is not easy to live in. Remember, every person sees the world differently. If a boor says that you are an uneducated person, you can try to refute his statement with your knowledge, but this is unlikely to work.

Method 2: A boor should not become the master of the situation

Try not to give the boor power over the situation so that they don't feel stronger.

If your boss is rude to you, and it is impossible to get away from it, think about the fact that you are not chained to him for the rest of your life. You are not a slave, you are only doing your job professionally, i.e. you help him carry out his work, which means you can call yourself a partner in a certain business. You can demand more respect for yourself because... you have every right to do this.

Method 3: Remember your rights

When someone is rude to you in a public place, you need to fight not with the offenders, but with their superiors.

Find out your first name, last name, position and contacts. You can ask for a complaint book, if there is one. If this does not help, try contacting a consumer protection society or a lawyer.

Use your weapons - human rights and leverage. This method is suitable if the boor is an official, manager, waiter, security guard or other representatives of large organizations

Method 4: Use your imagination

Try to imagine the offender behind a glass wall: you see him, you notice that he is expressing something, but you simply do not hear.

You can also imagine a boor in the image of a big fish in an aquarium: it seems to be moving its lips, moving its fins, but it is not clear what all this is for.

If you watched the movie "The Matrix", then you remember the moment when Neo stopped the bullets fired at him. Imagine that the rudeness thrown at you is like bullets, and you are invulnerable, and all the rudeness does not reach you, falling with a ringing sound on the floor.

Method 5: Try to contact the boor

Try to find out the reason for the aggression. For example, you can say: “Now you are being rude to me, why do you need this?” or “You have a smile on your face and yet you say mean things, so I haven’t figured out how to respond to your words yet.”

Perhaps the person who heard you will think about his actions, look at himself from the outside and rethink his behavior. You can use this method when communicating with people with whom you will have to meet and talk more than once - work colleagues, acquaintances, relatives.

There is a chance that a person will look at himself from the outside and rethink something in his behavior.

How to respond beautifully to rudeness

Rudeness can be treated well with politeness, which frightens boors, forcing them to be careful when communicating:

- “You see, dear, I do not intend to communicate with you in such a tone.”

- "Dear, you may have confused me with someone"

If the boor just can’t stop after all your attempts, then save your nerves, wish him all the best and leave the place of conversation.

Sometimes a boor needs to be put in his place, otherwise by your silence you will make them stronger. A good answer can close the mouth of a boor. But remember, being rude to someone who is rude does not make you superior.

Try using humor. If someone is rude to you, smile and say "What a fool (fool, idiot) you are!" Such an act can anger the boor even more, whose reaction will make you laugh.

Smiling back often irritates a boor, so smile sincerely.

- “You deign to be rude to me... Why? Is your goal to offend me? Why?”

Answer in such a way that your word is the last and then the rudeness will stop.

Don't pay attention to the boor. Imagine the scenario in your head: “You are a leaf on the road... Everything passes by and doesn’t touch you in any way.” .

In modern society there are many aggressive people, since the frantic pace of life leaves its mark on mood, behavior and interpersonal communication. At a certain period of life, people collide with each other, so avoiding conflicts is quite difficult. Sooner or later you will find yourself in the line of fire with a person who hurls insults. At such moments, you must fight back your opponent. Some start a fight, others react calmly. Let's consider all the methods in order.

Method No. 1. tediousness

1. The boring technique is quite common among intelligent people. If you are superior to your opponents in mental development, consider this option. If your interlocutor is trying to insult you, give him an analogy from scientific literature.
2. For example, you were reproached for having a mess on your desktop, as if you had evolved from a pig. Find your bearings in time and answer: “Darwin has repeatedly proven the fact that pigs are in no way related to humans. They don't work at a desk, so they can't create clutter in the workplace. Read the book to make more accurate arguments in the future!”
3. In addition to the fact that the fact will hurt the offender, the opponent will be confused. You will have enough time to plan further dialogue. Not many people have scientific knowledge; such a move would put the boor in an awkward position.

Method No. 2. Ignoring

1. Not every person can muster the will to turn on the ignoring mode, and besides, such behavior is not always appropriate. However, there are often cases when this tactic comes in handy.
2. If the insult is petty, a grin is the best option. Smile at one corner of your lips, thinking to yourself how much better the world would be without fools. If a person is narrow-minded and even stoops to base insults, show contempt.
3. Don't hold back your positive attitude. You can laugh in your opponent's face without responding with words. Make it clear that rudeness does not offend you at all, even if the situation is different.
4. The tactic of ignoring is to prove to your opponent his stupidity. It is possible that he will become even more furious when he sees your reaction. Namely, that his words not only do not bother you, but also amuse you.
5. If the person is sane, you can accompany the smile with a polite phrase. For example, “Is it just me or did you have a bad day?” If a person belongs to the category of boors, your attack will cause even greater discontent.
6. Unfortunately, the modern world is deteriorating, so it is important to use the ignoring technique correctly. It is suitable for arguing with ill-mannered people who do not watch their language.
7. Never try to justify yourself if you see that the insult is inappropriate. Again, it is better to ignore the attacker, smiling maliciously in response. Do not cross into the offender’s territory; such a move will obviously be a losing one.

Method No. 3. Calm

1. The previous options, namely “Ignoring” and “Boring,” are sarcastic methods. You suppress the offender through malice, some kind of mockery. This method differs in that you need to respond to insults in a calm tone.
2. Do not swear, use swear words or raise your voice several tones. Answer with a slight smile and be friendly. Find out what exactly doesn’t suit your interlocutor. Try to analyze the situation “piece by piece”.
3. Such behavior shocks the opponent, and some begin to feel awkward. A conflict situation often ends with an apology from the offender. This option will prevent the scandal from developing into a disaster.
4. If you have peace of mind and want to maintain harmony in your heart, do not respond with anger to an insult. When it is difficult to achieve this, take 5 deep breaths and the same number of exhalations, and then proceed to further dialogue.

Method number 4. Gratitude

1. The technique of gratitude is also called “Aikido”. Of course, experienced specialists do not advise engaging in assault. The technique consists of transferring aggression from the opponent to himself.
2. This option is suitable for people who are offended in the presence of colleagues or other large crowds of people. In such situations, it is important to defend your honor, but it must be done correctly.
3. Tell the other person that you are extremely grateful to him. For what? Because he spent a lot of time listing your shortcomings. Also clarify that you wouldn't do that because you don't care about him.
4. It is important that there is no sarcasm in your answers. The main thing is to be serious and calm, as if you were casually paying attention to the offender. By demonstrating fortitude, you will emerge victorious from the skirmish while saving face.
5. Conclude with another thank you. Let him know that in the evening you will think about your own shortcomings and try to correct them in the near future. As practice shows, such an answer misleads boors. At the same time, all the “viewers of the show” will definitely take your side.

Method No. 5. Revelation

1. In most cases, insults in the family circle or among close friends can be eliminated in time if you bring the opponent to a frank dialogue. It is important to step over your pride and stop resisting, then start manipulating.
2. Let your loved one know that you are uncomfortable listening to these types of complaints. Try to find out what they are supported by. If the arguments are true enough, listen and draw conclusions.
3. If you're in pain, let me know. As a rule, most situations are resolved peacefully. If people are dear to each other, they will be able to find a solution to any problem.
4. If we are talking, again, about family or friends, try to forgive the offender in advance. You yourself understand that irritation and indignation do not appear out of nowhere. Since the person is dear to you, try to understand and forgive him.

Method number 6. Humor

1. Positivity is everything! The recommendation is especially relevant in cases with poorly educated or close people. A good joke or a positive reaction to an insult will smooth out rough edges.
2. To defuse the atmosphere, you need to have a sense of humor. When you repel attacks in this way, the other person will become confused. His concentration will be broken as the insults take a different turn.
3. Further development of the scandal will become irrelevant after both laugh at the joke. It is important to reflect negativity in a timely manner so that it does not develop into something more.
4. Of course, not all situations need to be laughed off. For example, if you were insulted on the way to work (in traffic or public transport), the best option would be to distance yourself. Move away from the offender, making it clear that his company is unpleasant for you.

Win-win phrases

There are many phrases that will help you emerge victorious from a conflict situation. You can remember the ones you like and then use them for their intended purpose.

1. “Excuse me, are you finished?”
2. “What a pity, I thought you were a man with brains!”
3. “I can say for sure that the image of a boor does not suit you! Although…"
4. “Dear, please slow down. I'm not your wife (brother, matchmaker)"
5. “From your tone one can understand that you have confused the shores...”
6. “With your behavior, do you want to achieve the truth or a flattering answer?”
7. “Why would an educated person expose his shortcomings to everyone?”
8. “Don’t worry about me so much...”
9. “By getting personal, are you trying to compensate for your lack of intelligence?”
10. “Thank you for your interest in my person and life in particular. Your call is very important for us..."
11. “Why are you trying to offend me? Are you an energy vampire?
12. "Beautiful weather, isn't it?"

There are basic techniques that will allow you to save face and respond to insults with dignity. The most common options are boring, positive, ignoring, calm, gratitude and revelation. You will also find useful universal phrases that can be used in controversial situations.

Video: how to respond to insults

Each of us sometimes has to deal with human rudeness and listen to offensive words and expressions addressed to us. Some people have a tense atmosphere at home, while others are very unlucky at work, where a scandalous atmosphere prevails, ready at any moment to explode in a stream of abuse and insults. So how to respond to rudeness and rudeness?

Why do you need to respond to rudeness and not remain silent?

Psychologists have found that every aggressive act from the outside gives rise to auto-aggression in a normal person, which over time results in a depressed mood, decreased performance, low self-esteem, etc. This reaction of the body does not bring anything good with it, and, therefore, you need to learn how to effectively protect yourself from manifestations of foreign aggression and the correct reaction to it.

Reasons for rude behavior

One of the most common reasons for rude attacks on a person is his underdevelopment. Such people are much more likely to become victims of rudeness than strong and self-confident individuals. Boors and rude people have a fairly well-developed instinct and will never get involved with someone who can give them a worthy answer.

If in front of them is a person from a different category, then why not amuse yourself and say something rude to him. Most often, the following types of people are among the offended:

• highly cultured and brought up in old traditions;
• having low self-esteem;
• trying to avoid conflict situations;
• with a high sense of guilt;
• fearful of hurting and offending other people.

In this situation, the reaction to rudeness may be different, but first you should work on your own so as not to be a constant victim of poorly behaved citizens. Finding inner strength will forever get rid of outside aggression, because a strong person cannot be an object of attack.

Often in life you have to deal with rudeness, rudeness, and insults. A verbal insult is sometimes more painful than a physical insult. And sometimes such a wound can take many years to heal.

What to do? Should I respond in kind? Pretend that nothing special happened? That's possible. Or you can teach the offender a lesson so that next time he will think a hundred times before deciding to make another attack against you. What needs to be done for this? Just go to court with a statement. Of course, litigation involves certain time, moral and, possibly, financial costs. And only you can decide whether you want to punish the boor and rude person according to the law or whether you will silently endure his further antics.

The Universal Declaration of Human Rights, adopted on December 10, 1948 by the UN General Assembly, proclaimed in Article 12 the inadmissibility of arbitrary

interference in a person’s personal life and attacks on his honor. The concept of honor is determined by several criteria.

Honor is a person’s adherence to all the rules of moral and professional duty. This is a combination of moral and ethical qualities of an individual. The concept of honor usually goes in conjunction with the concept of “dignity”. Or another definition of honor:

honor is a complex moral, ethical and social concept associated with the assessment of such qualities of an individual as fidelity, justice, truthfulness, nobility, and dignity.

In Russian legislation, the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation contains an article “Insult” (Article 130, Chapter 17). Insult refers to crimes against freedom, honor and dignity of the individual. And by insult we mean humiliation of a person’s honor and dignity, expressed in an indecent form. In this case, it is not taken into account whether the assessment of the victim’s personality made in this way corresponds to reality. The only thing that matters is that this assessment was expressed precisely in a form indecent for public morality.

A criminal case for insult is initiated only at the request of the victim (Part 2 of Article 20 of the Code of Criminal Procedure of the Russian Federation).

The punishment for the insulter will be a fine of forty thousand rubles if the insult was inflicted in a private conversation or eighty thousand rubles if it was voiced publicly or published in the media or in any publicly displayed work. In addition, Russian legislation provides for correctional labor for a period of up to six months in the first case and for a year in the second. Corrective labor may be imposed as punishment at the discretion of the court.

You should also be aware that the offender can receive compensation for moral damage as a result of the dissemination of information discrediting honor, dignity and business reputation. The amount of compensation is determined in court, taking into account the moral suffering suffered by the victim, as well as the degree of guilt of the harm-doer. Compensation is paid in cash.