A quality inherent in every man by nature; you just need to know how to awaken it in your chosen one. Let's find out what 6 techniques will make your lover be attentive and generous.

Enjoy the gifts

Why do we love to spoil little children with gifts? They know how to sincerely enjoy them! Wanting to once again see the delight from the next surprise on the baby’s face, we will not be too lazy to spend money and time and buy another (even one hundred and twenty-fifth and not very necessary) toy, book, or whatever! Children's spontaneity and the ability to enjoy little things are worth learning: the more joyfully you react to every, even a very small gift from your loved one, the more he will want to please you again. Of course, we are not talking about pretense - insincerity is always felt and will serve you badly. But sometimes it is possible and necessary to learn to “turn on” the little girl in you who accepts gifts with admiration and joy.

Ask for help

Generosity goes hand in hand with the desire to care and protect. If your man doesn’t quite fit the image of a knight-defender, it’s worth thinking: are you giving him this opportunity? The image of a self-sufficient and independent “iron lady” can become so familiar that we gradually lose the habit of showing feminine fragility and weakness - and if this is so, then a man sometimes does not even assume that we expect him to show attention. Start asking your loved one for help - even if at first it will be difficult for you to do this, and your inner voice will persistently whisper: “I can handle it myself!” One of a man's basic needs is to feel needed, and if you give him this feeling, he will respond with generosity and genuine care.

Give thanks

A woman who, with enviable enthusiasm, scolds her chosen one for greed, but does not know how to thank her from the bottom of her heart, only contributes to the fact that her man will become more and more greedy and stingy day by day. For your loved one to want to spend money on you, appreciate the efforts he has made and be sure to praise his generosity - tell him how important this quality is to you and how you admire his masculine care and attention to you. Sincere gratitude and admiration can work wonders - even the most thrifty man will want to endlessly surround you with care and surprise you with gifts just like that, for no reason.

Talk about your desires

Men, unfortunately (or fortunately?), do not know how to read minds, and, as a rule, they understand hints with difficulty. Therefore, if your man is alien to manifestations of generosity, and this upsets you, do not expect him to “guess himself” about the reasons for your dissatisfaction - he won’t! Tell your loved one about your desires - but not in the form of reproaches (“You always feel sorry for my money!”), comparisons (“But Ole’s husband gives flowers for no reason!”) ​​or uncompromising demands (“I want you to buy me a coat "). The best way is not to criticize or manipulate, but to talk about your feelings. A loving man will definitely want to please you with at least a bouquet of flowers if you sincerely admit: “I would be very pleased if you gave me gifts more often - your attention means so much to me!”

Give yourself permission to dream

Sometimes we ourselves seem to block generosity in our loved one, sometimes without even realizing it. Has it ever happened that when a man asks “What should I give you, dear?” did you answer: “I have everything I need, don’t waste the money”? Or maybe you reprimanded your chosen one for giving too expensive a gift and even offered to return it to the store? Keep in mind: such a reaction is a super-powerful “silencer” of male generosity: what is the reason to care about a woman who “has everything” and who does not consider herself worthy of expensive gifts? If you, looking at women surrounded by male attention, wonder how they achieve such an attitude, here is the answer: they are simply not afraid to desire and know how to accept what they want - with gratitude, but also with dignity, without fear of “owing” and without trying act as an accountant, counting every penny a man spends.

Capable of action, doomed to be loved...
Women's wisdom

I'm looking for a man capable of action: to be the support of the family, to protect and take responsibility in difficult times. I am looking for not just a strong male who can facilitate conception, but also become the father of my child, provide for my family, and take on material concerns when I cannot earn a living while on maternity leave.

I am looking for a loved one and a close person who I can rely on and trust. “Isn’t it a lot?” - you ask. A little. Fine. If at least something from this list is characteristic of a man, he is doomed to be loved, many women believe.

Some people think that women's sympathies are on the side of brightly handsome macho men, always rushing after their capricious luck, changing women, cars and interiors. Yes, girls like guys like that too. But for some reason people marry those who not only look like men, but are also men.

And a man does a real manly thing

You can learn to say a thousand beautiful and necessary words by hanging fancy noodles on women’s ears, but you will never learn to perform real masculine actions.

- What would you do for your beloved? – I asked my friends.
- I would wash the dishes...
- I can go sleepy and clean the snow from the car...
- I always take out the trash...
- I give her my hand and let her go ahead...
- I cook dinner when I come early...
- I bring money into the house, is that not enough?
- Every day I give her unforgettable sex.
- I buy her gifts...
- I write poetry and dedicate novels to her...
- Every day I give her a new star...

Many small and big actions, which make up the thin fabric of our relationships. Do we know how to notice and appreciate them, do we not take them for granted, and are we talking about these actions when we identify a real man by them?

Sometimes men forget that protecting their woman and children is not an act, it is a way of life for an adequate man, she cannot do without this protection, but she can easily do without the stars from the sky.

Some people think that men's actions are some kind of heroism, a feat. Of course, there are also feats, as for example, the world champion in scuba diving Shavarsh Karapetyan, who saved 20 people by diving into icy water to a drowned trolleybus, and was seriously injured by breaking out windows with his bare feet. Then he reproached himself for not saving more. Shavarsh himself became seriously ill and had to retire from the sport. Heroes save people from fire, throw themselves under the wheels of a car to save a child, risk their lives for the sake of people.

But I would like to draw attention to men’s actions, which require no less heroism, but we encounter them at every step.

During a divorce, a man leaves everything to the woman - an act that is several orders of magnitude higher than any gifts.
A man's act is to keep his word.
It is a masculine act to take blame or responsibility for a problematic situation.
A man’s act is not to run away from problems, not to shift them onto someone else’s shoulders (most often women’s), but to resolve them as they arise.
It is a man's act to stay with the children and raise them if the mother is not there.

I saw this scene in a supermarket.

The old lady stood with a cart, which contained just nothing: a loaf of bread, kefir, a pack of cottage cheese and tea. I asked the cashier not to punch everything at once, I was afraid there wouldn’t be enough money... After each punched purchase, I counted out the change. Behind her stood two well-dressed guys with chips and beer. They made noise with displeasure and impatiently stomped around the counter with chocolates. Healthy, prosperous.

Hey grandma, come on quickly, don't hold up the line.

The old woman frowned in embarrassment and smiled pitifully at the cashier. And suddenly the man standing in front, who had not yet had time to move away from the cash register, resolutely thrust several bills into the cashier’s hand.

Come in, grandma. I'll pay for you.

She was so embarrassed. She babbled words of gratitude, but the men were already gone.

Unfortunately, sons raised by single mothers have no one to follow as an example in order to perform real (that is, normal) masculine and human actions. Today we find ourselves in a situation where a man is “good” simply because he earns something, drinks rarely and little, and does not beat his other half - thereby, as it were, he already commits a certain act. Such a “positive hero”. And nothing more is required from him.

Only here a man can leave his wife and child without a livelihood, while he drives around in a Mercedes. Only here can it be considered normal for a man to not work and lie on the couch, while a woman works hard at three jobs and provides for her family. Don't you think that we ourselves sometimes indulge this, raising our sons incorrectly and allowing our husbands to take advantage of us?

It seems to me that we need to remember that a real man’s action is possible where there is a woman who can inspire him to this action.

Vlasenko Irina

This phrase from Coco Chanel best (and shortest))) characterizes our dad. This does not apply YET to the “man” who rides on his father’s shoulders. It would be great if Yegor inherited at least some of his father’s qualities... It’s funny that Lena said the same thing on the eve of the wedding: “Dad, if my husband is even a little like you, I will be happy”))) Misha for a long time I considered this the main achievement in my life, and then Yegor appeared and I immediately found something to strive for next)) The patients who remained in Russia believe that there were more achievements. Some asked Misha to become the godfather of their children, who were born healthy thanks to Misha. Some still write on social networks: “Yes, all our women in Udachny prayed for him!” Before emigrating, Misha worked under a contract in Yakutia. 20 years have already passed, but people remember. In general, Misha is from Crimea. When we arrived in Yalta as part of our enchanting novel...

Former colleagues from the Yalta maternity hospital, including the charismatic chief of medicine, came out to meet him, although Mikhail Borisovich had not even called them for 10 years. And then I decided to meet, and they came, as if they had parted the day before yesterday. So what if I didn’t stay in the profession, Misha thinks... but I don’t have “my own cemetery” (a medical term that surgeons and obstetricians-gynecologists know), all my patients and all “my” children are alive.

It’s curious that Misha’s grandfather received all his children from Misha’s grandmother, himself... A remote railway station near Chita.... by the time you get to the maternity hospital, it’s completely unrealistic in winter. 14 children... and Misha devoted 10 years to medicine. He cut himself out for ideological reasons: “career growth requires compromises, - alas, Russian medicine is, mmm, how can I put it mildly? - immoral. Yes, gynecologists earn good money, but the more I earned, the more I feared for Lena’s future and her safety ". Kidnapping was a harsh Russian reality. Lena graduated from university in Canada.

Today Misha’s profession is construction and hardcore (what do we care about snow, what do we like heat, what do we like torrential rain...). Sometimes buyers of new units ask Misha: “Can we make sure that our house is finished by you?” The owner of the company takes potential partners to Misha’s facilities and pretends that this is how everyone works for him))

Wow, today Yegor has a full set of daddy's boy, which is encouraging: agility - 2, curiosity - 3, leadership qualities - 10, imagination - 4, and a sea of ​​charm. He is very stubborn and persistent. But easy-going and kind. He flies up to the ceiling and becomes rowdy if he loses at anything. “We won’t take Mom with us to play cards anymore - she often comes across jokers.” “Dad, tell mom in a STRICT VOICE to give me candy.” But. The favorite symbol is the heart, the most often gifted person is the mother. Dad got 4 pieces for his birthday)) Happy birthday, darling)) We are all very proud of you))

A man who truly loves his lady can be easily distinguished from one who is just pretending to be. You can be sure of your man's love if he does certain things.

Psychologists have found out exactly what actions can indicate that your man really loves you with all his heart. The secrets of male psychology have long ceased to be secrets. It's time for you to find out whether your chosen one truly loves you.

What matters most

It is not gifts or flowers that are important, but actions on a different level. These are not even words, not confessions, but something else. Sometimes you think that your man doesn't show love at all because he doesn't give gifts, but that's not true. We are all different, but men have certain actions in their arsenal that they do not always decide to do.

It is important to remember that you should always be a priority to your husband or man. This is an immutable fact that confirms the presence of feelings. If they don’t put you first in life and don’t take you into account, then this is not love.

Actions of a loving man

Even if he doesn't agree with you, he can accept your opinion. Let him only pretend, but this is already pleasant, because he cannot argue with you for too long. A loving man knows how to listen and be flexible with a woman. If your man never gives in to you, this does not mean that he does not love you, but it does not mean the opposite either. Perhaps he has such a bad character, so do not lose heart ahead of time.

He makes compromises without your pressure. It doesn’t come right away, so don’t be horrified if it doesn’t happen either. He will get to know you over time, and then, without warning, he will push his interests aside from time to time for your sake. If he loves you, then you don’t need to constantly ask him for something, force him to do something. Your man knows everything himself.

In the eternal question “Loves or does not love?” It’s difficult for us women to understand men. One, without blinking an eye, makes a confession in order to achieve a closer relationship, and having received his, he leaves in English. The other is silent like a partisan, but carefully wraps you in a warm blanket on a cold evening. How to distinguish pretense from true feelings, so as not to create illusions?

Women love with their ears

Girls attach great importance to words and emotions. We need confessions, sweet text messages, jealousy. Having heard “I love you,” we are ready to follow our chosen one barefoot in the snow. And at the same time we don’t think about it: why did he fall in love on the first evening? Among the strong half of humanity there are many talkers, ladies' men, property owners, etc., for whom love for you may be no stronger than for grandma's pies. And making a confession and giving you a storm of feelings and emotions costs nothing for them. And - not only for you.

True love is proven by actions, not words.

Chatterboxes do not put into words the meaning you expect. When the phrase “I love you” becomes a habit, it becomes devalued. A serious man will not rant about a suddenly erupted volcano of passions. He will not rush things and throw around beautiful words. After all, a love confession imposes certain obligations. Let's understand a simple truth: don't trust words, believe deeds. The verbal expression of feelings, of course, is pleasant, but only in combination with “speaking” actions.

Actions are better than words

It is believed that actions speak louder than words. But jumping off the roof of a garage, calling you “Babe” 100 times during the day, sending SMS “Ya.T.L.”, behaving like a boy, constantly making you and those around you amuse yourself is funny, of course, but such one-time “manifestations of feelings” don't mean anything. Perhaps you got an impulsive gentleman who wants to be the center of attention. The true feeling is caring for a loved one, attention, help and understanding. Sometimes a victim, if you want. Changing your life for the sake of your loved one is an act. Don’t stop her from being happy, even if it hurts too. And a man who is capable of action is doomed to be loved, Coco Chanel once said.

The world is yours

Flowers, gifts, restaurants, sudden surprises... Of course he loves! Or?.. In fact, generosity and ingenuity are not necessarily signs of sincere feelings. Sometimes a man just likes to feel his worth. And he makes broad and beautiful gestures not for you, but for himself. But if he remembers “your” dates, knows your preferences, is attentive, most likely, everything is serious with him!

The female sex takes meeting their parents seriously. And if the gentleman introduces you to mom and dad, you, as a rule, are already secretly choosing a wedding dress and thinking about how many children you will have. Carefully! In some families, parents are calm about their son’s many hobbies and have nothing against him bringing them to his father’s house.

Getting to know your parents may not always reveal your true feelings.

Or, on the contrary, they demand that the child settle down and have grandchildren, and he has to constantly arrange “bride shows”. It's probably worth taking meeting your parents seriously after you've been dating for quite some time or your boyfriend has made an official proposal to you. The same applies to communication with your relatives.

Real feelings

A man loves you if:

Interested in your life. He is always ready to listen to you. Even if you say stupid things, even if the World Cup final is on TV. He listens because he knows that it is important for you to discuss something or cry into your vest. And not only listens, but also takes part in the conversation, rejoices, calms, scolds your offenders;

Pays attention to your wishes. Does the phrase “I really want chocolate ice cream” thrown in passing encourage your beloved to go on a date with that same chocolate ice cream? He is not indifferent to you;

He does something necessary for you, even if you didn’t ask him for it, and constantly shows concern. When you are sick, instead of lunch, he runs to you with oranges - you need vitamins! He often calls to make sure that you are okay, and not to find out where you are and with whom.

The main manifestation of love is caring

He warms your hands in his palms and says with slight reproach that you should have dressed warmer today. He comes to pick you up from work to take you home because it’s raining heavily outside. And it doesn’t matter that to do this he needs to travel from one end of the city to the other;

Does not limit your personal space, respects your interests. Are you into skydiving? No “Are you crazy?”, just “Be careful, love.” Do you often stay late in the evenings at cutting and sewing courses? “When will you sew me something?” And, of course, a loving person will never force you to make a choice - “either I, or...”. You can always come to an agreement with him if something doesn’t suit him. Because he loves you and doesn’t want to lose you;

Admires you. Tired, nervous, unmade up, sleepy - for a loving man you are always beautiful, and he lets you know about it - in words or deeds.

Yes, we women love with our ears, but if you have to choose between someone who only talks about love and someone who does everything for you but does not voice feelings, think carefully. After all, you won’t be full of words. And you will most likely be called by someone who prefers to do rather than talk.

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