And safety! Our article is devoted to the safety of children's sleep. This is a very important topic that is so little covered in Russia.

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome

Death in a dream of a child in the first year of life is associated with the syndrome sudden death infants (SIDS). A perfectly healthy baby suddenly dies in his sleep. Most often, such cases are recorded during sleep, which is why this syndrome is called “death in the cradle.” Babies in the first year of life are most at risk of SIDS; the risk is especially high in babies in the second and third months of life. 90% of all cases occur in babies under 6 months.

However, SIDS is only part of the conditions that come under the term “Sudden Unexpected Death of Infants” (SUDI). A significant portion of cases of SUD are accidental asphyxia and suffocation in bed.

Organization safe sleep newborn is the most important measure to reduce the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome

The unexpected death of a baby in a dream is a rare phenomenon in Russia only 43 cases per 100,000 children born were registered. However, attention should be paid to safe sleep management even if it saves the life of at least one child!

Sources of information about safe children's sleep

In Russia, unfortunately, a targeted unified campaign to inform parents has never been carried out; there is very little information in open sources. That is why we were forced to turn to foreign sources, in particular:

• American Academy of Pediatricians www.aap.org
• American Academy of Sleep Medicine sleepeducation.com
• American National Sleep Foundation www.sleepfoundation.org
• National Center for Sleep Research www.nhlbi.hih.gov
• Infant Sleep Information Source www.isisonline.org.uk
• Consumer Reports www.consumerreports.org
• Security Commission consumer goods www.cpsc.org
• American Institute of SDVS www.SIDS.com
• SIDS Alliance www.firstcandle.com

In the same room with parents

One of the first questions that parents look for an answer to even before the baby is born is where will he sleep? It is important to know that sleeping in the same room with your parents for at least 6 months is much more comfortable and safer! It is important to understand that sleeping in the same room as your baby reduces the risk of SIDS by 50%

You will be able to hear and react quickly if your baby cries, burps, or has trouble breathing. In Russia, almost 100% choose to sleep in the same room with their baby up to 1 year of age.

Is it dangerous to take a child into your bed?

Adults have been taking in children since time immemorial! This is as old as time! Since ancient times, children and parents slept together for warmth and comfort. But the term “putting a baby to sleep” has been known since ancient times. What does this mean? These are situations in which a mother, having put her baby to bed next to her, breastfeeding him, falls asleep and accidentally (unintentionally!) presses the baby’s nose and mouth with her breast or another part of the body, as a result of which the baby cannot breathe. Preventing this situation was the task of zemstvo doctors of tsarist Russia, as well as pediatricians of young Soviet Russia, from which propaganda posters remain.

Over the past 20 years, scientists have devoted a lot of time and effort to the question: Is it dangerous to take children into your bed? Security issue co-sleeping a child of the first year of life in the same bed with parents or other people is a subject of active scientific research and controversies to date.

The research results are somewhat troubling. Today, there is extensive statistics of tragic cases associated with sleeping in a parent's bed. It has been proven that co-sleeping even in the absence of smoking and the use of alcohol and drugs by parents, there is a high risk of developing SHS in the infant.

However, not all researchers support this point vision, emphasizing the strong evidence that co-sleeping helps support breastfeeding. There is an opinion that the issue of the safety of co-sleeping with a child should be discussed carefully, taking into account the cultural level of the family and the personal beliefs of the parents. A clear position on this issue is presented only American Academy of Pediatrics, which prohibits co-sleeping due to high risk development of SUD, especially for children in the first three months of life, even in the absence of parental alcohol consumption and smoking. This position was supported by Canada, Australia and Oceania, and most countries in Europe and Asia.

The most the best solution It will be a good idea for you to ensure that your baby sleeps directly next to your bed. In a cradle, in a side crib or in a bed with sides, but not in your bed!

It will be easy for you to feed and soothe your baby, and you yourself will sleep better, knowing that you have taken everything possible measures so that your baby is not in danger.

Safe sleep - Unsafe sleep

9 mistakes in organizing Safe Children's Sleep in the image above (right block):

• sleep in a separate room
• sleeping on your side
• head-to-bed position
• pillow
• two blankets
• cap
• the crib is by the window
• the crib is next to the radiator
• without a pacifier

If you have consciously chosen to Co-Sleep

If, no matter what you have chosen, you need to minimize the potential hazardous factors. Our recommendations will help you create safe and comfortable conditions and minimize the risk of trouble:

• Your bed should be absolutely safe for your baby. The mattress should be hard, even, the sheet should be stretched and secured. You should not sleep on soft feather beds or water mattresses.
• Use bed guards to prevent your baby from falling out of it.
• If your bed is pushed up against a wall or furniture, check every day for any gaps between the bed and the wall where a child could fall.
• The child should lie between the mother and the wall (not between the mother and father). Fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers do not have the maternal instinct, so they cannot feel the child. Often mothers wake up from the slightest movement of the baby.
• IMPORTANT! If you find that you only wake up when your baby is already crying loudly, then you should seriously consider moving your baby to your own crib.
• Use large mattresses to ensure there is enough space for everyone sleeping

• Do not sleep with your child if you have overweight, this may lead to dangerous situations. How to check how dangerous your weight is? If your baby rolls towards you because the mattress is too compressed under you and a depression is formed, then you should not practice SS
• Remove all pillows and the heavy blankets from your bed.
• Do not wear shirts and pajamas with ribbons and ties, and keep long hair away
• Remove all jewelry at night
• Do not use perfumes or creams with strong odors
• Don't let pets sleep in the same bed as your baby
• Never leave your baby alone in a large bed unless you are sure that he is completely safe.

Dad lovingly chose a crib, grandmother gave the new parents hand-embroidered linens for little pillows and blankets - everyone tried to arrange the bed of the new family member so that he could sleep comfortably and happily there. With trepidation, you laid the baby down where he would spend his first night in his life, but after a while it became clear that he had his own opinion on this matter. The baby wants to sleep with his mother.
Even if the child is healthy and does not experience special difficulties in order to adapt to life in new conditions - problems with digestion and the nervous system, in his mother’s arms he is both calmer and simpler. A situation familiar to many: a baby who seems to be sound asleep is placed in a crib, but not even half an hour has passed before he is awake again and requires attention. What to do if it is almost impossible to let go of the child - he cries. During the day you can lie down and relax with him, but what to do at night? Should I sleep with my child or separately? Some argue that a child should be taught to have separate rest from the very beginning; others, on the contrary, will argue that sleeping together is best way get closer. Perhaps there is no definite answer to this question and cannot be. Since, as in everything else related to children, each mother makes a decision individually, having familiarized herself with different opinions and research.

We are together

1. The first and very significant “pro” is that you won’t have to wake up and get up many times. Every mother knows that getting up in the middle of the night and walking somewhere to feed the child is very tiring! While sleeping together, you can simply tuck your baby into your chest and sleep safely. This, by the way, also applies to cases with children in custody. artificial feeding. All babies, regardless of whether the mother has milk or not, are determined to sleep together. Look at baby animals, for example. After all, they, like people, do not have obsessive ideas: what should be done, how and why. They simply obey their instincts. Our babies, regardless of the type of feeding, retain the sucking reflex.

3. Famous American pediatricians William and Martha Sears - married couple, who raised eight children, believe that “sharing sleep,” as they call it, is simply necessary for parents and children. A special attention This is worth paying attention to those whose babies are not growing well and gaining weight. To solve this problem, doctors recommended putting such children in bed with their mother back in the last century. Pediatric practice also indicates that children sleeping with their mother do not experience abnormalities in the level of oxygen in the blood and breathing problems.

4. The hormone prolactin, which is responsible for the amount of milk, is produced mainly at night. Night sucking maintains good lactation.

By the way, among many peoples, co-sleeping is not even discussed. Basically, of course, these are different ethnic groups: Indians, Africans, Indians, Balinese. Closer to us are the Mongols and Uzbeks. Maybe because they are not spoiled, like Europeans, by the fruits of civilization and are still guided by the instincts inherent in nature. After all, if you think about it, why do children sleeping in their cribs fall asleep hugging plush toys? Yes, because they simply need to rely on someone when falling asleep! Of course, it’s better if it’s mom, but if she’s not there, then at least let it be a toy.

Of course, that's not all positive aspects, and every mother can add to this list a couple more reasons why she and her child need to sleep together. For example, the happiness of both when waking up.

Mom, get up!

Now let's look at the disadvantages of co-sleeping. Today he has much fewer opponents. But there are circumstances in which, despite all the obvious benefits of sleeping with a child, it does not bring the desired results or does not justify itself.

1. You quickly get used to good things. Of course, it can be difficult to teach your baby to rest in his crib later. However, by the time parents begin to “move” the baby away from them, many children are already ready for this and move to a separate sleeping place without much protest.
2. Mothers whose babies are bottle-fed, unfortunately, still have to get up at night. You need to prepare a bottle, and sometimes you need to wake up the baby. All we have to do is wait until the baby learns to sleep through the night without snacking.
3. It is better to decide whether you leave the baby with you at night or not as early as possible. If you resort to this remedy after having already tried all other ways to improve his sleep patterns, it will not work.
4. Naturally, when a miracle snorts nearby, the question of intimate life parents have to decide somehow differently. From the practice of family psychotherapists, it is known that the presence of a baby in the parents’ bed harms the adults rather than the child. For couples whose relationship suffers after the birth of a child, this is the first question that is asked at the reception. To feel comfortable and not worry about the baby's reactions, it is best to move marital sex to a separate place, take care of soundproofing and use the time when the baby sleeps the deepest.

There are also worries that are more far-fetched than based on real dangers. You can often hear from mothers: “the child will grow up spoiled and not independent” or “what about the possibility of crushing the baby in his sleep?” A child grows up spoiled if mistakes were made in his upbringing, but not because of co-sleeping. By the way, the same Dr. Spock who strongly recommended separate sleep, by the end of his life, abandoned many of his views on the development of children, including this one. As for the fear of suffocation in a dream, this is also largely a myth. If the mother is not under the influence of alcohol or drugs, then her instincts and reflexes work well. And even in her sleep she is able to respond to the baby’s movements.

Sweet dreams

As you can see, there really is no answer to the question “sleep with your child together or separately.” Oh, this “mother’s” lot is to always make decisions for herself! It is worth accepting it, having studied all the pros and cons, based on observations of your child - children do not always fit into generally accepted rules. Based on his individual needs and listen to what your heart tells you. Have you decided to sleep together? Then follow these simple rules:

1. Stick to it basic hygiene. If the baby is still very small, put him in a separate diaper. And if he sleeps in the same underwear as you, change it as often as possible, without using harmful additives when washing.
2. Get rid of odors that prevent your baby from feeling you around. It is advisable not to use products with strong scents. Perfumes, eau de toilette, dad's perfume and shaving products, not to mention heavy tobacco spirits - are not the best atmosphere for a restful child's sleep. Another great reason for dad to quit smoking.
3. Children under about two years old do not need pillows. In the first years, their spine is formed and strengthened. When the time comes, the baby will reach the pillow himself. And, of course, a baby blanket or bedspread should only be made from natural, not hot fabrics.
4. Mom’s nightgown should also be made from natural fabric and without buttons: with a large slit to make feeding convenient.
5. If you decide to keep your baby with you when he starts to grow up and out of infancy, keep in mind: children perform an incredible amount of acrobatic tricks in their sleep. There is even a selection of photographs on this topic somewhere on the Internet: a sleeping family was photographed every half hour, and each time the child found himself in different places and in different poses. He crawls, rolls over from his stomach to his back and back to his stomach again, but in the other direction. He sits down and, unfortunately, falls... To avoid falling out of bed, place the child between you and the wall, and cover the places from which escape is possible with pillows or bolsters.
6. We adults have not paid attention to this for a long time, but for a child it is very important correct temperature and air humidity. The correct temperature is 16-18 degrees (yes, it may seem too cold, but sleep is healthier in a cool room) and humidity 50-70%. When a child appears in the family, buying a humidifier is very helpful.

That's probably all. Well, each of us can supplement this with our own experience gained in practice. Have a nice and happy sleep for you and your kids!

Yulia Solnechnaya
Discuss on the forum

Family is not only a pleasant change in the life of every person, but also a huge responsibility. First of all, it falls on the shoulders of those spouses who decided to have and raise a child, because every mistake in their actions can become irreparable.

All in all

Adults periodically return to discussing the topic of “sleeping together with a child.” There are many supporters, but many opponents. When expecting their first child, all parents buy cribs for their babies, but subsequently they are often used for other purposes. In the first months, children sleep a lot, provided that their mother is nearby. It happens that they fall asleep well in your arms, but if you then put them in a crib, they wake up very quickly and cry.

During patronage, doctors advise young parents on how to feed, what kind of care to provide, and where to sleep for the child. They advise from the first days to accustom the child to a separate crib. Sleepless nights dealing with infants exhausts parents both physically and psychologically. Soon, some women, giving up on theoretical knowledge on issues of education, put the child in their bed. So, let’s look at the topic “Co-sleeping with a child: pros and cons.”

Arguments that co-sleeping is acceptable

Breasts are often latched to the breast at night; this is very convenient when sleeping together. The mother does not have to walk from her bed to the crib or feed while sitting, where there is still a risk of the baby being dropped by a tired woman who falls asleep while walking.

1. Mom has the opportunity to sleep at night.
2. Next to the mother, the baby is warm, which is important when his heat exchange is imperfect. After all, cooling the body promotes the production of stress hormones. In addition, the child feels safe and develops normally.
3. There is no risk that your baby will suffocate when wrapped in many blankets during the cold season.
4. The newborn's breathing is regulated alongside the mother's regular breathing rhythm.
5. When a mother practices co-sleeping with her baby, breast-feeding in bed, it was noted that the baby light sleep(first and second stages) predominates. It is physiological and helps prevent respiratory arrest and sudden infant death syndrome.
6. A child's brain grows and develops during light sleep. By promoting the separation of mother and baby, people do not use the natural capabilities of the brain for constant development, limiting them.
7. If a child sleeps with his parents, he behaves much calmer and cries less. If he starts tossing and turning, mom immediately reacts and calms him down. When organizing a child’s sleep in a separate crib, in a separate room, she cannot quickly respond to crying, the baby’s level of stress hormone increases, and he cannot calm down for a long time.
8. Mom worries less if the baby sleeps nearby.

What do opponents of co-sleeping claim?

1. There is a risk of crushing the child. This is impossible. If the mother does not drink alcohol or sleeping pills, she, being in a state of sleep, reacts to the slightest movement of her child.
2. Arguments about the complex intimate life of parents. This issue can be resolved.
3. The child becomes overly attached to his mother. Attachment to parents will always be, but psychological consequences Sleeping the baby separately can be avoided.

All more people talk about the benefits of sharing sleep with your child. But there are cases when you don’t need to do this:

1. When parents use alcohol, drugs, sleeping pills, or smoke.
2. If the parents have contagious diseases.

Parents independently decide which dream they will choose. You can choose a compromise: place cribs for babies next to each other.

About cribs

If you can't decide which crib to buy, then rational decision At first, you will use a stroller with a detachable cradle. Having rocked the baby in it, you move it to right place without shifting. It is possible to move with the stroller, for example, to the parents’ bedside. For up to three months it can replace your crib. We do not recommend buying all kinds of cradles, cradles with canopies, lace, as they are not only beautiful, but also dangerous to use, especially when the baby starts to sit up.

What kind of cribs for children over one year old can be purchased? You can buy a transformable model that can be attached to the edge of your bed. Such designs are more expensive, but very convenient to use when sleeping together. Manufacturers also offer playpen beds with music, rotating mobiles, and a night light. They have a disadvantage: often the mattress does not meet orthopedic requirements. AND high cost. There is also a cocoon bed, but it is irrational; it is only used for up to four months. While theorists are discussing, businessmen are suggesting, mothers are looking for answers and solutions.

A good compromise would still be an additional crib. The child constantly feels his mother next to him, so he sleeps more soundly. If the baby is restless at night, a woman only needs to extend her hand to calm him down. You can feed your baby without getting up. At the same time, he sleeps as if separately, gradually leading to a sleep separate from his parents. When choosing such a crib, you must take into account that it must be securely attached to the parent's bed, adjustable in height, and be static. A baby can sleep in it up to two years old.

Children's sleep

Newborn babies sleep a lot, 19-20 hours. From 1 month, sleep becomes shorter, from 6 months - even shorter. By the age of one year, the child sleeps twice during the day. 13-14 hours are allotted for sleep. per year? On night sleep- no later than 21:00, gradually switch to one nap during the day. During the transition, on some days the child can sleep twice a day, on others - once, depending on how he feels. Try to avoid falling asleep with a bottle or sweet drink at this time. Don't start a war when getting ready for bed, come up with rituals for the process of going to bed, for example, quiet games with toys, dim lights in the room, bathing before bed, light massage, a lullaby for babies - an ancient sleeping pill.

Since ancient times, these songs have been endowed with mystical properties. People believed that every mother should come up with a unique tune and words of amulets for her child. Times have changed, but lullabies continue to live, helping to calm a child, and in some ways even influencing his upbringing. Hyperactivity, crying, moodiness, aggression on the part of the baby indicate that he is tired and wants to sleep, react to this correctly. You can take him in your arms. In this situation, a lullaby for babies performed by the mother will be very useful - the child will gradually calm down and go to sleep.

To those who are higher

Older children can be read or told bedtime stories. Gradually, this will become your child’s favorite bedtime ritual. Starting from the age of two, many children listen with pleasure and repeat after their parents “Ryaba Hen”, “Turnip”, “Kolobok” and others. Fairy tales are very attractive to children because they are not only text, they are like a small performance that includes gestures, singing, and moments of theatrical play. A fairy tale can be told every evening, interpreting events, descriptions, enriching it with new details. This does not make the child’s interest disappear, but increases. The baby waits for new details, calms down and listens attentively, which helps him fall asleep quickly.

"Checking out" to a separate crib

As the child grows up, parents think about the age at which co-sleeping with their child is acceptable. What to do when you reach this age? How to teach a child to sleep alone?

From birth to three months, children need to be constantly close to their mother, hear her heartbeat, feel the warmth of her body, they do not separate themselves from their mother. Until 6 months, the baby is completely dependent on the mother's care. After this age, night feedings become more frequent. From birth to a year or two, breastfeeding is considered the norm, and the child often continues to sleep with his parents. Once babies are weaned, they can be easily trained to sleep separately. But from two to four years old, children are tormented by night terrors, for this reason they want to sleep with their mother, to see her presence, which must be taken into account when switching to sleep separately from their parents.

Based on the experience of individual families, we can conclude that it is better to do this during the crisis of three years (at 2.5-3 years), when the child increasingly begins to say: “I myself.” At this age, adults usually no longer need help with the potty. But this does not mean that immediately after the third birthday you need to start abruptly weaning children from co-sleeping. Organize this process gradually.

You can buy a crib for dolls, start putting toys in it with your child, sing lullabies together and tell fairy tales. Then buy a crib for the baby. If you don’t have one yet, take your child to the store with you and choose with him. At home, after assembling the crib, “place” your favorite toy in it. Start with daytime sleep in it, gradually moving to nighttime sleep. A child may wake up at night, cry, ask to see his parents, fulfill his request, let him sleep with you, gradually this will fade away. Do not combine the transition process with weaning, with a painful condition, the birth of a second child, when moving to a new place of residence, during placement in kindergarten. Don't rush to distance your baby from you. Children grow up quickly. The time will come when you will fondly remember the time when the little one snored next to you.

A little more about children's sleep

You've had enough long time transfer your child to a separate sleep, but in his own crib. The reasons may be different, analyze what is stated below and “try it on” for yourself.

1. An ill-conceived ritual of getting ready for bed.
2. Night cold if the child constantly opens up. I would recommend sewing it to upper corners blankets have buttons and loops that are fastened around the crib railings. The blanket will always be in place, no matter how the child tries to throw it off.
3. Fear. Think about what it might be connected with and eliminate the cause.
4. Hunger. Don't go to bed hungry.
5. Frequent illnesses that require increased attention from the parents.
6. The child's reluctance to break the habit of sleeping with his parents. Here you need to show patience, perseverance, consistency, organizing a gradual transition.

Possible solutions to the problem

Try the following:

1. Go to bed at a strictly designated time. Stick to the regime religiously.
2. Organize nap only in a crib.
3. Consider a bedtime ritual. An hour and a half before bedtime, the atmosphere in the house should be calm and measured. For example, a walk before bed, dinner, quiet games, reading books, going to bed in accordance with the developed ritual. Do not scream, do not make a scandal, do not explode if the child refuses to lie down separately from you.
4. Try not to overuse motion sickness.
5. Allowing favorite toys to be brought into the crib brings a sense of security because the child treats them like living people. Allow as many toys as the baby wants in the crib. You can also take your favorite books. This is fine.
6. Use a night light as children are afraid of the dark.
7. Do not transfer a sleeping child to a crib. Waking up alone at night, he will be scared.
8. It is advisable to isolate the crib with a screen, curtain, and place it in another room. The child should have a separate space for sleeping; if it is closed, this is a signal that it is time to sleep.
9. Set a rule: after completing all the rituals of going to bed, after a fairy tale and wishes Good night You can no longer wander around the apartment. The child must understand that the demands are serious; he will not pity his parents. Some children are afraid to fall asleep alone, they begin to ask for a drink, go to the toilet, complain that their stomach hurts, that noise from the street is bothering them - all this is done in order to capture the attention of their parents and begin to manipulate them. It also disrupts sleep. In such a situation, it is necessary, without a scandal, to silently bring the child to the bed. There is no need to swear, reassure, console, as this is what is required of parents. If you silently accompany your baby to bed several times, he will understand that mom and dad will not give up on their demands, that it is time to sleep.

Young parents can be advised to study the book “Co-sleeping with a child. A Parent's Guide by James McKenna. It discusses and does not question the issue of a child sleeping next to his mother. The author justifies his opinion.

At birth, due to a change in environment, the child experiences severe stress: the beating of the mother’s heart, emotional and biochemical exchange, and a single physiological rhythm have disappeared. All this is very frightening for a newborn. The author argues that in order to avoid the consequences of such a situation, the child must always be close to his mother. Regarding the popular belief that a baby can be crushed in his sleep, James gives recommendations on how to avoid this. He also draws attention to what can happen at night when a helpless child in a separate crib is left to his own devices. It's the noise and shadows in the room that can be scary; midges landing on the crumbs and causing disturbance; a leg caught between the bars; a blanket covering his head and blocking the air supply. The author claims that putting a child to bed alone at night is tantamount to a crime.

If the baby sleeps with his mother, feels the warmth of her body, her smell, hears her breathing, he cries less often, he does not produce cortisol - a stress hormone, so the number of heartbeats does not increase, oxygen absorption is not reduced, and therefore the process does not slow down growth. The child gets rid of constant stress, develops well, gains weight, his abilities are revealed early, and at an older age he is non-conflict. The mother produces breast milk well with close skin-to-skin contact. Sleeping together with parents brings father and child closer and forms mutual intimacy and love between them. McKenna reminds readers that people have been co-sleeping with their children for centuries. And only civilization has brought many strange recommendations from the perspective of pedagogy, often based on pseudoscientific research. The author writes in the book about the experience of raising children in the family of his parents, that the newfangled recommendations of Spock were not applied there, according to which many families raise their children.

In conclusion

Unfortunately, intuition does not tell many parents what newborn children experience and feel. The maternal instinct, which should be trusted, often cannot break through from under the layers of all kinds of information, conventions, and prejudices. Having been born, having entered another world, the child is in a state of comfort in the arms of his mother or next to her. Left to himself, left without attention, he experiences the experience of dying, of falling. This refers not only to co-sleeping with a child, but also to the issue of teaching children to hold hands. Nature has programmed babies to sleep together with their mother, this does not depend on how the baby is fed: breast milk or a mixture. If this need is not fulfilled, it is a time bomb waiting in the wings. This can appear at any age. As an example: the fear of loneliness at night leads to the fact that someone has many pets and allows them to sleep with them, someone suffers an unsuccessful marriage for fear of being left alone in bed at night. We are not aware of this fear, it is on a subconscious level. Mothers who are afraid of co-sleeping need to think about whether they want a sad fate for their child.

Co-sleeping with a small child is a controversial topic even among doctors. On the one hand, it is much easier for a nursing mother to establish breastfeeding if the baby sleeps nearby and she does not have to get up to him at night. The baby is calmer, cries less and allows parents to get a good night's sleep. But pediatricians often express the opposite opinion: sleeping next to a child is dangerous, harmful to the child’s psyche and family relations. Whether to take your baby into your parents' bed is up to you to decide. But if you feel calmer and more comfortable sleeping with your child, you need to first of all think about the safety of sleeping together.

Pros of co-sleeping

If you choose co-sleeping, know that this is a wonderful contribution to your baby's mental well-being. Sleeping with parents is a biologically justified expectation for an infant who is weak, defenseless and cannot survive without the care of an adult. Feeling the mother’s warmth nearby, the baby is calm and confident in the safety of the world around him.

Co-sleeping makes it easier to establish breastfeeding and ensures a sufficient number of night feedings. Babies sleeping in separate cribs receive less milk at night than those sleeping in their parents' bed. As a result, the mother’s lactation rate gradually decreases.

And it’s definitely more convenient for a mother to sleep with her baby. She doesn't even have to wake up at night to feed the baby. Of course, some hyper-responsible mothers still feel uncomfortable around their children, but this is rather an exception to the rule.

You can learn more about the benefits and nuances of sleeping together from our article, and detailed information about the research of scientists on this topic is presented in the article

How to organize co-sleeping with your child?

Organizing co-sleeping with a baby is not at all difficult. But all parents decide how to sleep with their child differently. Some do without a crib at all, placing the baby next to them from birth. Others practice co-sleeping only starting in the middle of the night, after the first feeding of the night. During the day and at night, the baby is left to sleep in his crib.

Co-sleeping can be understood as sleeping directly in the parent’s bed, or in a crib with the side removed, moved towards the adult’s bed.

There is also a “transitional” option for children older than one and a half to two years. The child is provided with a sleeping place “for growth”, usually a single bed, where one of the adults sleeps with the baby.

Sleeping together with a newborn frightens parents because the baby seems very small and fragile. This proximity of young dads is especially frightening. And for good reason: adults need to follow a number of conditions for healthy co-sleeping.

1. Both parents should not smoke.
2. Alcohol, drugs, strong medications, sleeping pills and psychotropic drugs are prohibited.
3. Co-sleeping can be dangerous if you are sick or feel overly tired.
4. The baby must be full term and healthy.
5. After feeding, you need to put the baby to sleep on his back.
6. You should not swaddle or overly wrap your baby - he may overheat. Best option– light pajamas. Remember: the baby's body temperature rises from the mother's body heat.
7. The temperature in the room should be approximately +22 if the baby is not yet 6 months old, and +18...+20 for children over six months old. The optimal indoor humidity is 50-60%. The room needs to be ventilated regularly.
8. Do not use or use minimally cosmetics and perfumes with pungent odor. They mask the mother's natural odor, can make the baby's sleep restless and even make it difficult for him to breathe.
9. It is important that an adult’s bed meets all the requirements for a place for a child to sleep (read more below).
10. Pets do not belong in the bed where the baby sleeps.
11. You cannot leave a baby unattended on an adult bed and put him to bed with older children who do not understand that small child defenseless and at risk of suffocation.
12. Possible danger for a child - sleeping with parents who are extremely obese.
13. Breastfeed your baby. When feeding a baby up to 4-5 months, the mother should wake up to prevent possible suffocation of the baby or choking on milk.

Don’t be afraid to infect your baby with any transmitted infections by airborne droplets. Sleeping together in this regard is no more dangerous than kissing and hugging.

Requirements for a parent's bed

The main danger of sleeping together is that the baby is still completely helpless. He may fall from his parents' bed or suffocate in the bedding. It is important to remember: an adult’s bed should be absolutely safe for a child.

Observe the following requirements for a place for children to sleep:

• Smooth, hard mattress. A soft sofa, water mattress or folding chair are not suitable for sleeping together with a child - the baby may suffocate on their uneven surfaces.
• The bed should be wide enough to comfortably accommodate adults and babies. The child needs at least 60-70 cm, and about the same for the mother.
• Clean bedding, which must be changed regularly. Children do not need a pillow until they are at least one year old. Mom's pillow should not be soft or fluffy. Ideal option– latex, buckwheat husk, material “with memory”.
• It is better not to use a blanket that is too thick bed linen. Breathable, cotton fabrics are preferable. If you consider a blanket necessary, then mother and baby should definitely have separate blankets! Parents' pillows should be kept as far away from the child's face as possible. You should not leave unnecessary objects or toys on the bed. It is better for mom to sleep in light clothes made from natural materials, without ribbons or ties longer than 20 cm.
• On the side where the child sleeps, it is necessary to install some kind of fence. You can move the bed close to the wall or purchase a special side for a children's bed. You can put a cushion on the side and support it with the backs of chairs. As an option, place a purchased but not used crib with the side removed next to the bed. Of course, it should be adjusted in height and be practically one piece with an adult bed.

The intimate life of young parents and co-sleeping with a child

Opponents of co-sleeping scare young parents possible difficulties in sexual life if the whole family sleeps in the same bed. In fact, the birth of a child, one way or another, makes changes in the intimate sphere of life of a new mother and father.

If you live in a separate apartment, it is quite possible to show love to each other in another room, in the kitchen or in the bathroom - as much as your imagination allows. Those who are confined to the walls of one room (for example, those living with their parents) will in any case have to decide for themselves how comfortable they will feel making love not far from a sleeping child.

Be that as it may, psychologists consider it safe to have sex with a newborn and a child up to one and a half years old. If the baby accidentally wakes up at the most interesting moment, he will not understand anything. But after one and a half years, it is necessary to monitor so that the child does not accidentally witness the sexual activities of his parents. He can get psychological trauma, considering what he saw to be a manifestation of cruelty and aggression.

Co-sleeping with a baby: safe positions

Co-sleeping takes practice. It can take a mother from two weeks to a month and a half to adapt to the presence of a child nearby. Of course, if the baby is not the first, this will happen much faster, but for a mother with many children, sleeping together does not pose a problem at all.

Normal co-sleeping eliminates the possibility of leaning on the baby during sleep and ensures a comfortable position for the mother herself. It should be comfortable for a woman to feed while lying down.

A safe position for co-sleeping (while feeding) looks like as follows. Mom lies on her side, i.e. not on the side, but on the shoulder blade; her head lies on the pillow or on her own hand, and her shoulder lies on the bed. The baby's head should be slightly tilted away from the mother so that the baby's nose does not stick into her. See what this safe co-sleeping position looks like in the photo below:

After feeding, it is better for the baby to sleep on his back, and for the mother in a position that is comfortable for her - on her back or on her side.

Co-sleeping and pregnancy are also compatible. But here you need to take into account the comfort of the bed on which the whole family sleeps. If the bed isn't too wide and you're worried your older child might kick you in the stomach at night, it may be time to gradually move him to a separate crib. However, some parents sleep wonderfully with their first baby throughout the entire new pregnancy, and then the four of them continue sleeping together.

Co-sleeping cot

Modern industry offers products for children and their parents to suit every taste. Some cribs are made with the ability to remove one of the sides. In addition, there are special cots for sleeping together:

If you want to sleep with your baby from the first days of his life, also pay attention to such an interesting product as a changing bed, designed for co-sleeping with parents from birth:

We hope that our article will help you organize a comfortable and convenient sleep for all family members with your baby. Have a peaceful and joyful night!

P.S. And finally - a little humor on the topic of sleeping together!

Finally, mother and baby are home - back from the maternity hospital.
If the mother stayed in the RD with her child, then perhaps she was already familiar with co-sleeping.

A beautiful crib has been prepared for the child, but is it worth rushing to put the child in it?

Co-sleeping is basic need any child, having satisfied which the child easily and without difficulty moves into his own separate crib.

Let's start from the very beginning
Man is mammal, and baby mammals in nature sleep closely huddled close to each other and to their mother. Their mother breastfeeds them until weaning, protects them, and warms them. The cub knows that as long as its mother is nearby, it is safe.
The cub cannot yet take care of itself, and if the mother is not around, he experiences fear and anxiety. The mother also has a feeling of concern for the baby, for his safety, for adequate nutrition.

Natural for humans, as well as for mammals, because that is how she created us nature.
If the need for shared sleep is not satisfied, then this causes anxiety in the baby and the mother.
Many mothers are not aware of their condition and suppress feelings of anxiety, which leads to degradation of the maternal instinct, but this does not change anything.

Example
The mother rocks the baby to sleep, puts him in the crib, but after a while an alarming cry is heard. The child woke up, found that his mother was not around, and burst into tears. And the motion sickness starts all over again. This can go on more than once. And so, the mother puts the child in her bed, next to her, and discovers that he fell asleep easier and became better sleep.
But in fact, mom herself changed her behavior - she began to satisfy natural need your child - so that the mother is always nearby.

Why does the baby need this?
A child, being next to his mother, feels her presence, her hugs, feels her warmth, smell, hears her breathing and the beat of her heart... All this is familiar to him even before birth - in the womb, and tells the baby that he is safe . The baby also receives the attention and love of his mother, which he really needs.

The peculiarity of children's sleep is that shallow sleep prevails over deep sleep, at this time the child sleeps very sensitively and feels whether his mother is near him or not.
Sleeping together can reduce his anxiety, allows him to fall asleep faster and easier, as a result of which the child gets better sleep and his nervous system develops fully. The baby wakes up only to eat or pee, and not out of fear of loneliness. Mothers usually notice that if the child sleeps in bed with her, then his sleep is much calmer and better.
Co-sleeping is essential for good relationship between mother and child, in the future.
When you sleep together with your baby, his trust to mom, confidence in its reliability. The baby wakes up, feels his mother nearby and calms down that he is not alone.

Even during the day, it is better for a child to sleep in his parents’ bed. Young children have a very developed sense of smell and the child, feeling his mother’s scent, even though she is not sleeping nearby, gets a feeling of security.
In a dream, a child recycles new information which I received in a day. If he sleeps with his mother, then he does not need to be distracted by “dangers”, and the process of understanding the world is more complete.

Thanks to co-sleeping baby grows more calm, less likely the appearance of various phobias, fears, neuroses and other similar problems. A baby sleeping with his mother feels that he is needed and loved. Such children have higher self-esteem and are more confident in themselves. These children are more friendly and positive towards others, they even develop better than children who sleep separately from their parents.

What does co-sleeping give to mom?
If the baby is nearby, the mother does not need to get up often, rock the baby, or check how he is doing in his crib. A mother who sleeps with her baby gets better sleep, good mood. If the baby wakes up at night to eat, the mother does not need to get out of bed... and rock him to sleep. Without getting out of bed, I gave the breast and continued to sleep. A well-fed baby next to his mother falls asleep easily and quickly.

When a mother senses the presence of a child, her body produces prolactin, a hormone responsible for milk production. Therefore, co-sleeping allows establish breast-feeding and keep it for a long time.

A mother who sleeps with her baby has a better sense of what the baby needs. at the moment: if it’s cold and the baby is opening up, cover it up, or if it’s hot, open it up… Sleeping together helps awakening the maternal instinct, promotes the development of intuition, thanks to which the mother feels what the child needs at the moment.

When sleeping together with her baby, the mother is much more comfortable to a greater extent feels more like a mother than when a child sleeps in his crib.

If a mother goes to bed during the day with her baby, the baby will sleep longer and more calmly than usual.

When mom and baby sleep next to each other, their sleep cycles coincide, so she wakes up easily at night to feed the child or put him on the potty, and easily falls asleep with the baby. If mother and baby sleep together, then the mother can control the baby's sleep. If he suddenly gets worried, then she can immediately prevent awakening, hug the baby, press him to her, quietly hiss: “shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssbabies and childrenss babies (ssss babies and childrenss babies and childrenssssssssshes bone bones this...and in almost all cases.. And in almost all cases the child calms down and continues to sleep.
If the baby wakes up early, then the mother can take a nap for some time while the baby is busy with important things, for example, studying his arms and legs.

If a mother goes to work early and does not have the opportunity to spend much time with her baby, then co-sleeping- just salvation.
It will help make up for the lack of communication and helps strengthen the bond between mother and child, maintaining affection for each other.

Opponents of co-sleeping with a child
1. For some reason, many parents are afraid that they may fall asleep soundly and accidentally crush the baby. This It is absolutely impossible with a mentally healthy and balanced mother. The fact is that every mother instinctively strives to protect her child even in her sleep. And sleeping separately suppresses this instinct.
But , if you really don’t trust yourself, there are options for this:
- a horseshoe pillow that can be used to protect a child;
- a crib with the side removed, moved close to the adult bed.

When sleeping together, if the dimensions of the bed allow, dad does not have to go to sleep on the sofa. He will feel comfortable sleeping next to you, on the edge of the bed.

2. It also happens that the husband opposes sleeping together, fearing for the marital relationship. But you can also have sex in another room, in the bath, in the kitchen... when the child is sleeping.

When should you move your baby into your own crib?
Here the situation is the same as with self-weaning in breastfeeding: or with potty training:
Everything has its time and everything is individual.

When the child is ready to sleep separately, he will let you know about it, then move him to his own crib or room.
This usually occurs around the age of 3 years.

Mothers complaining that they cannot move their child to a separate crib or room: either - these are mothers of children under 2-3 years old: at this age the child is not yet ready for separate sleep, or - these are mothers of children after 3 years of age: children who slept separately from birth, and as adults decided to compensate for the lack of co-sleeping in infancy.

A child who shows signs of being ready to sleep separately from his parents resists his crib.
A crib for a child is not just a place where you can sleep, but it is also a separate corner, his own personal space, which should not only please the child, but also in which the child will feel cozy and comfortable.
Therefore, before you buy a crib for your child, ask him what exactly HE wants! Maybe he has some special wishes and his own preferences. After all, he later sleepin her, not in you.
Go to the store with your child and let him choose his own crib, bedding and linens.

Do not try to move your child into it on the first day of purchasing a crib. Let the resettlement happen gradually.
Before you begin the Great Migration, make sure you have established bedtime routine. Continue the same routine when you move your baby into your own crib or room.
Give your child time to get used to the crib:
- Play a scene with toys in front of your child: your child will see a teddy bear kissing his mother good night and wrapping himself in a blanket in his crib. Let the bear's mother sing him the same lullaby that you sing to your child.
Familiar things will help your child understand what will happen next..
- Play soothing, relaxing music for your child before bed, read a bedtime story or sing a lullaby.
- Place your child’s favorite toy in the crib: teddy bear or a doll.Let the child sleep with this toy and hug it. This will help the child not feel lonely.

You do not have the opportunity to let your child choose his own crib and you were given someone else’s crib:
- Tell your child about the new crib in advance, showing, for example, his cousin's or sister's bed and saying that he will have his own too. Make him look forward to this relocation.
- Giveit’s time for the child to get used to the new crib from the outside, andin the crib while the bear sleeps.

You are forced to move your child away from you into a separate bed before he is mentally ready for this:
- If you are transferring a child from your bed to a separate bed in order to make room next to you for his future brother or sister, who is about to be born, then try to do this at least 2 months before the birth of the youngest baby.
- Do not start moving to bed when you are teaching your child to potty, use a spoon, or moving to new home. Children will not be able to cope with so many changes in life.

If you see that the child is not yet ready to move to another bed or room - wait, give him and yourself time to get ready.